Stress has become one of the components of our lives. We are afraid of the boss, we are angry with the neighbors, we argue with the sellers. Constant stress is depressing. A person sees only gray colors, he has health problems. How to calm down and not be nervous, you ask? Below I will list simple ways fight stress.

How to stay calm before an important event?

So, in a week, an important event should happen in your life. It could be an interview or a presentation of your work. Your future career will depend on how you perform. What to do if everything falls out of your hands, at night you can’t sleep and are constantly worried? The answer is simple: it is unlikely that you will take the position that you so dream about.

If you still want to succeed, stop being afraid. You must understand that you yourself can destroy your dream. Don't be dramatic. Do some breathing exercises. During the exercise, thoughts should only be about breathing. Inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth.

Go for a walk before bed. During the walk, also try not to think about the upcoming meeting. Turn on your favorite music and enjoy.

Night sleep should be at least 7 hours. Don't eat at night.

To keep the body in excellent shape, you can take multivitamin complexes. They will help boost your immunity and strengthen your nervous system.

How to behave during an important event?

So, the long-awaited hour has come. Your future will soon be decided. You must remember that experiences are superfluous. Start your morning with a contrast shower, exercise and a delicious breakfast. All these procedures will cheer you up and set you in a positive way.

Set a few alarms in the evening so you don't oversleep. Leave the house early: it is better to wait for the start than to be late for it.

Feel confident when you enter the office. People around you will notice this and treat you differently. The back should be straight, the voice well delivered. Watch your gestures, facial expressions and intonation. Do not wave your arms too much, laugh for no reason or raise your voice. Speak calmly and be calm.

Be sure to bring water with you. You may need it during the performance. Feel free to pause for a few seconds and take a sip of water. This will help calm the nervous system and refresh you.

Do not rush to answer the question quickly. Scroll it over in your head again, and then give an exact and clear answer.

More than half of our fears are taken from nowhere. That is, we ourselves invented them, believed in them and began to be afraid. According to statistics, women have more such fears. They invent various fables for themselves and willingly believe in them. Take life easier and remember that everything depends only on us!

Inga, St. Petersburg

Psychologist's comment:

The worldview of a psychologist is quite different from the philistine. Psychologists are taught not only to hear the content, but also to feel the unconscious process.

This is a very useful skill, it helps to perceive the world much more widely and not to get into trouble. Now I will try to explain with examples.

Example #1.

If a guy invites a girl to a movie, then in 90% of cases this is not at all what he has in mind. And if we honestly voiced the invisible unconscious process, then the phrase would sound something like this:

Let's go to the cinema and then have sex?

(The top phrase is what the words say, and the phrase below the line is the subtext, the true meaning of this phrase)

Let's go to the cinema?

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I like you! Let's go to the movies and then have sex?

It’s bad if a girl is not trained to perceive this process, because if she goes to the cinema, then most likely the couple will part, dissatisfied with each other and the evening spent. 90% of girls are well aware that when they agree to "go to the cinema", they agree not only with watching the movie, but give hope for further development relations.

And they don’t go to the cinema with those with whom they are not going to deepen communication. Or they stipulate in advance that it will be “only a movie”.

Let's go to!

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I like you too. First, let's go to the cinema, and then we'll see.

Example #2.

When a gopnik on the street says: “Hey, kid, come here, you need to talk,” he doesn’t need to talk, but to take away the money from the kid. If the kid really believes that he is only called to “talk”, he is not ready for the realities of life and will be dissatisfied with what happens next. It's good and right to teach guys that "talk" in some situations means a completely different thing.

I wanna talk to you

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I want to take your money

I brought the most simple examples. They are obvious to an adult, but not to a teenager. As we grow older, we gain experience, and those processes that we did not recognize in youth seem obvious to us in adulthood. And then we say to ourselves: how much I did not understand before!

Our life is permeated with such processes that we do not voice. Psychologists say that we convey 7% of information in words, and the rest is in what we do not voice. Let's look at this article from the point of view of a psychologist and see what new understanding will open up to us.

In this article, the feeling of fear and irritation is perceived as something harmful and interfering. No doubt, these feelings are very unpleasant and even painful. But my deep conviction is that their pain comes from the fact that we do not know how to handle them. We simply do not know how to deal with our fear and irritability.

Psychologists do not perceive feelings as enemies: we believe that any feeling is necessary and necessary because it has a useful purpose. Useful for us.

Fear and anxiety

A useful purpose of fear and anxiety is to warn of danger. Fear is necessary for us to recognize the danger and take action. He will be with us until the danger passes or until we learn how to take measures to prevent this danger.

Fear pushes us forward, makes us react, and not sit back. And in this sense, it is very useful. Our task is to consult with him, not to get rid of him.

Another thing is that fear should not paralyze us, it should not control us, as in the example:

In a week, an important event should happen in your life. It could be an interview or a presentation of your work. Your future career will depend on how you perform. What to do if everything falls out of your hands, at night you can’t sleep and are constantly worried? The answer is simple - it is unlikely that you will take the position you so dream of. If you still want to succeed, stop being afraid. You must understand that you yourself can destroy your dream.

In this position, to advise to stop being afraid is the same as to advise a mouse to become a hedgehog so that the fox does not eat it. Unfortunately, such advice does not work, because it is not feasible. We can't take it like that and stop feeling. Such recommendations were ingeniously played up in the popular video "Stopit!" ("Stop it!"):

I repeat, fear will be with a person until he realizes what the danger is and takes action.

To take this example, how can action be taken? First you need to understand that part of the anxiety (healthy part = rational fear) is caused by an important event in a week, and most (irrational fear = neurotic fear) is the result of some internal process and does not apply to the present.
For example, this person has been afraid of disappointing his mother since childhood, or he was punished for deuces at school. That is, 99% of the fear of an interview refers to childhood, to an invisible process inside, and not to an interview at all. Childhood has passed, but fear has remained, and by inertia affects a person’s life:

I'm afraid of an interview

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I'm afraid to disappoint my mother

And such a person will not be able to “stop being afraid”, no matter how they convince him. He understands everything, but he cannot, because the fear of his mother (dad, teacher) still sits in his head. If people could do this, then the psychologist would say at the consultation:

- Stop that! Stop being afraid now! Don't you realize that your career depends on this job interview!? Get up and sleep right away!

Thank God psychologists don't work like that.))

There are several hundred directions in psychology. And they have different ways dealing with fears. However, most of them have one thing in common: they work not only with content, but also with unconscious process.

One option is for the psychologist to help the client become aware of this process and take action - there, in the unconscious. Then half of the fears that the client has in life resolve themselves.

Irritation and anger

Irritation and anger signal us about obstacles. And they will be with us until the obstacle is overcome, until it prevents us from achieving our goals.

Let's take this advice:

Write a letter. When a lot of problems have piled up, nerves are at the limit. Take a pen and a sheet of paper. Write down everything that you don't like and that makes you uncomfortable. After that, the letter can be torn into small pieces or simply burned. Looking at the flame, believe that all problems are burning up like this sheet of paper.

If you have ever tried to use it, then you know that problems do not fly away from this. Only the person himself flies away - we are distracted, and for some time we can disconnect from problems. And when we return, all the problems pile up again. And so, the irritation reappears.

The psychologist notices not only the stated problem - irritation, but also the unconscious process (which is easy to realize) - "I can't cope."

I'm annoyed that problems have piled up

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I accumulate problems and do not know how to solve them in time

For a psychologist, the essence of the problem will not be to remove irritation, but to understand what the client is doing to make problems accumulate? The psychologist will perceive irritation as a signal, a symptom, and the reason lies a little deeper. The psychologist will perceive the client’s request to “remove irritation” in the same way as the dentist will perceive the patient’s request to relieve a toothache.

The dentist, of course, will relieve pain, but not at the expense of painkillers, but by removing the pathological process. Likewise, a psychologist, of course, will help with irritability, but not due to the fact that anger and problems will burn out in a candle flame, but due to the fact that it will help remove the cause of irritability.

1. Let's make a plan to solve your problems and see how quickly you can solve them.
2. Let's see which problem irritates the most and how to solve it as soon as possible.
3. Let's see how you accumulate problems and what prevents you from solving them on time.

Learn how you are!

As in the story with the dentist, the patient cannot fill his own tooth, so in the story with the psychologist, the client usually cannot figure out the causes of irritability himself. Indeed, we know more about how to fill a tooth than about where feelings come from.

The average person spends more time learning how to use a computer than learning how to use their own head. Therefore, ideas about the work of the psyche in our society are very naive. This means that the decisions made about how to deal with problems are also very naive.

The psychological worldview is a fascinating and very useful thing. This approach allows you to see the problem deeper - in its entirety. Do not be deceived by the size of the tip of the iceberg, but feel what is really happening. Then our decisions become deep and wise, even if they concern such simple things as fears and irritability.

Alexander Musikhin, counseling psychologist, psychotherapist, trainer, writer

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Nervousness occurs in various life situations: before or during some critical events, at the moment of agonizing expectation, when communicating with people.

In this article, you will learn how to stop being nervous and how to control your nervousness.

Nervousness can be due to both physiological and psychological reasons.

Causes of nervousness and anxiety

Physiological causes occur when nervousness is caused by our physical health condition. For example, our level of fatigue can affect our level of nervousness. Nervousness can arise from hunger, lack of vitamins, lack of sleep.

The psychological causes of nervousness are related to the psychological state. Absence, pessimism, timidity, feelings of insecurity, fear of failure - all this can cause nervousness.

Very often, these two types of reasons appear together, which is why an integrated approach is needed to work with both reasons in order to stop being nervous.

It is important to understand that nervousness is caused by internal factors more than external conditions. Nervousness is our response to what is happening around us. And how we react is largely up to us.

That's why different people react differently to the same situation. Some become nervous when talking to a few people, while others remain calm when they have to make a presentation in front of a huge crowd.

Of course, there are situations that will make them both nervous. We can't always influence the triggering of these events, but we can improve what we have inside to change the response to the events outside world: stop being nervous and worrying over trifles.

You can't always avoid stressful situations. To do this, you will have to not go to work, not drive a car and not leave the house at all. Stress accompanies every human life, and there is no way to avoid it. Therefore, we will improve ourselves.

Some people may think that it is normal and natural to be nervous and anxious in front of people during important meetings. But this is not true: anxiety is not the norm. You can get rid of nervousness and feel much calmer in stressful situations.

This is the first thing you need to understand before moving on.

There's no point in being nervous

The second thing you need to understand is that there is no point in being embarrassed and nervous.

Although nervousness or anxiety and fear can manifest as defense mechanisms that make us react to potentially dangerous situations - most often they take on an absurd form.

So, for example, this happens when we are nervous in front of people or nervous before an interview. After all, these situations are not dangerous; so no need to worry!

Any person who is more collected, organized and his mind works better in those moments when he is calm and in control.

When we are nervous, it is difficult for us to concentrate and think. Our body begins to show unnecessary physical activity. If we go to an interview or some kind of meeting, it can get in the way. We may forget something important.

Constant and chronic nervousness is bad for health and is the cause of many diseases.

Anxiety does not give us anything; it only hinders our development. So we have to get rid of it and we can do it.

The practical part of the article will consist of several parts:

• Preparation - what you need to do to prepare your body for possible stress and be less nervous, for example, during an important meeting;
• Self-control in real time - how to control yourself in a stressful situation;
• Overcoming the consequences - how to calm down after stress;
• Preventive treatment - how to teach your body not to respond to stress.

If you are nervous before some important event or activity, then it is time to be prepared to prevent the negative impact of anxiety on the course of events. A more cool and focused person is more likely to succeed.

This applies to interviews, important meetings, negotiations, events, etc. What will you do if you can't pull yourself together before one of these events?

1. Don't be dramatic

If you're worried about something, very often that "something" is actually a small, harmless thing. Are you not being hired? So what? You will find another. Will you look funny in front of people? So what? Don't you care?

Consider each vital issue in some context of your entire life and a long period of time, and not in terms of immediate necessity. For example, you are worried that the person you like will refuse to meet you. So what? In a few months you will surely forget him and you will meet another person. If you fall in love with someone, it does not mean that he / she is the person of your whole life.

Try to think of situations that make you feel anxious. Try to think calmly and calmly. Many problems seem serious and significant at first glance, but if you analyze them, their significance disappears immediately.

Unexpected barking of dogs can scare you, but if you pull yourself together and assess the situation, it may turn out that the dog is on the other side of the iron fence, attached to the chain, and he is not barking at you at all.

It's the same with human problems: surprise can be confusing, but once you look closer, things get better than they first thought.

If you are unable to respond calmly to the subject of your worries (most likely it will be), and you are still worried, then do not think about the upcoming situation at all. Keep your mind off this. It's not all that simple: annoying thoughts will attack you again and again. Try not to become obsessed with these thoughts, switch to something else every time they occur.

The exercises below will help you overcome these difficulties. And remember, there is no point in being nervous. But telling yourself to calm down isn't always enough, because your body is still reacting to stress. So you have to work with your body.

2. Relax your whole body

Relaxed body = calm mind. Yoga methods are based on this principle. This truth has long been known - people who are calm, able to control themselves.

Try to direct your attention to the muscles and relax the tension in them. As a result, you will feel more calm and relaxed.

3. Eliminate nervous gestures

Stop pacing back and forth in nervous anticipation. Stop biting your nails, pulling your hair, smoking every 10 minutes - in short, stop doing involuntary things with your body when you are nervous.

Sit quietly and still, relax. Watch yourself.

4. Breathe in your belly

When people are nervous, they breathe from their chest. Thus, breathing increases, and becomes intermittent. In order to calm down, you should breathe smoothly into your belly at regular intervals. This technique is used in folk medicine, as well as in ancient practices such as yoga. The so-called diaphragmatic breathing has long been proven effective.

After smoking a cigarette, the smoker feels relaxed, and not only because of the action of nicotine. He inhales and exhales slowly, so he stabilizes his breathing and he calms down.
Take advantage of this effect, but without cigarettes.

How to breathe with the diaphragm? Sitting in a quiet and motionless position, put your hand on your stomach (this is necessary for self-control). You must inhale and exhale at the same length of time. For example, inhale 5 seconds - exhale 5 seconds. You can hold your breath between inhalation and exhalation. Inhale - 5 seconds, hold your breath - 2 seconds, exhale - 5 seconds, hold your breath - 2 seconds.

Do exercises with or without delays - as you wish. The hand that rests on your stomach rises up and down in time with your movement of the abdomen, and the chest remains motionless. It is important!

When you learn to breathe with your belly, there will be no need to keep your hand on it.

Try to keep your attention on your breath and on the intervals between inhalation and exhalation. Do not be distracted by third-party thoughts and silently rely on yourself.

One session may last from 2 to 5 minutes, or may take longer, depending on your feelings.

This is very effective exercise, which always helps if you need to calm down and pull yourself together. Try doing this when you are tense, you will feel the instant relaxation that this simple practice gives you!

Self-control during the event

So everyone is looking at you. During an event, job interview, or meeting, it's not always possible to sit down, relax, and try to pull yourself together. You must speak and answer questions in a timely manner. What will you do in such situations?

1. Watch your facial expressions, gestures, intonation

Watch your body. Make sure your movements are smooth, the pace of speech is steady, and your facial muscles are relaxed. If you find yourself talking too fast or making too many sudden movements, stop yourself.

Your goal is to make sure that your appearance expresses complete calmness. inner peace creates the outer, and vice versa. The calmer your posture and facial expression, the calmer you are inside. Human emotions have feedback with body.

That is why people advise to smile more often: if a person tries to portray some emotions on his face, he begins to feel these emotions. You can check it yourself. Smile at someone!

Why should you take care of yourself? Because when you watch your body and its movements, and when you try to control them, you are paying close attention to what is going on inside you.

It's like you keep your mind from emotions by changing it to the position of an outside observer. This good way keep some distance between your true ego and the feeling in the moment. This allows you to stay focused and calm.

Some emotional storms may rage within you, but your mind will still be quiet. It may be difficult for those who have never experienced it to understand. But this ability comes with the practice of self-control.

2. Take your time

Haste never leads to good things. It can cause nervousness and scattered attention. Rushing when you need to do something quickly, as a rule, does not have any positive impact on the speed of a specific task implementation.

When you are in a hurry, you start to fuss, switching abruptly from one subject to another. In this state, you can easily forget something and not finish something. This negatively affects the quality of the result.

Therefore, take your time, even if time is running out and someone is rushing you (this is done by those people who do not understand that there is no need to rush). Do everything at your natural speed: calm and collected.

Prepare carefully for your speech, do not rush to answer questions as soon as possible, your speech should not be very fast.

3. Overcoming the consequences

It's all over! Relax and don't overuse "if" ("if I spoke better", "if I didn't forget"). If you didn't manage to pull yourself together and were very worried despite your best efforts, don't be discouraged.

Self-control is not an easy task and requires long and hard work on yourself. Analyze your mistakes, but don't dwell on them.

Relax and calm your breath. Diaphragmatic breathing will help you relieve nervous tension.

Preventive treatment

Even if you have learned to suppress attacks of nervousness, this is not enough. It would be better if you become less nervous at all. To do this, you must regularly carry out preventive measures.

1. Follow a sleep schedule

A constant lack of sleep has a bad effect on health and, in particular, on the nervous system. Make sure you get at least 8 hours of sleep every day. It is advisable to go to bed at the same time. Basic principle: regularity and duration. More than 8 hours of sleep is not recommended, also.

Sticking to a sleep schedule works wonders. It makes you more energetic, alert and increases your resistance to stress.

2. Eat healthy

Eat a balanced and varied diet. Your body needs to get the full spectrum of vitamins. Eat less fried and fast food. Eat more food that contains essential nutrients for your nervous system (magnesium, vitamin B, zinc, antioxidants): whole grains, nuts, various fruits and vegetables.

Drink more water. Dehydration can trigger stress.

3. Get fit

Move more and spend time on outdoors as much as possible. Try to take a break from your computer if you can. Go in for sports. Sport strengthens the body, relieves tension and stress.

4. Meditate

First, a meditation session helps you relax. Secondly, regular practice increases resistance to stress. This is why unruffled stillness has become the hallmark of the experienced yogi or experienced meditator.

Unlike yoga, you do not need an experienced instructor or a special place to start meditating. You can meditate anywhere. Learning the basics of meditation is easy, and even an inexperienced person can do it.

5. Get rid of bad habits

Although smoking and alcohol may calm you down for a short period of time, the substance contained in cigarettes, alcohol and other drugs negatively affects the nervous system.

The more and more often you use alcohol and other drugs, the more your body is exposed to stress in Everyday life. Do not abuse coffee! Caffeine triggers the release of stress hormones in the body.

6. Try not to create stressful situations yourself

For example, if you are preparing to take an exam, you do not need to worry and be nervous if you are well prepared and know the subject. You are calm, as there is no situation that could contribute to stress. Conversely, if you have not prepared well for the exam, you begin to worry and think that you will certainly come across the topic that you know the least.

Get ready for important meetings and negotiations so that you have no reason to blush. Think ahead and always have ready plan actions. Follow the plan.

Chronic nervous tension is a companion of our time. We are constantly nervous and worried about something in our lives: about ourselves and about our future, about relatives, relatives, children, about work, about money and many others, not always important things. A lot of disturbing thoughts run through your head every day, causing constant stress. Many are in nervous tension, not even realizing the real reason for their anxiety. Therefore, in this article we will talk about how to calm down when you are very nervous, how to find harmony and inner peace.

Anxiety and anxiety are natural, and even useful tool, with which our body informs us about external threats. That is why the fight against stress is often not effective. Unfortunately, there is no one universal technique or “not to be nervous” switch. What works great for keeping calm for some people, for others, is completely ineffective. Therefore, try and choose exactly the method that will help you calm down and not be nervous for you.

Exercise "square breathing"

Helps to cope with anxiety and excitement, it is easy to move from a negative to a neutral, calm state. The square breathing technique can be used if you are very nervous before meetings, important negotiations, public speaking, exams. The exercise is very simple, everyone can do it, and does not require special training, it is performed in 4 steps:

• take a breath and at the same time count to yourself: “one thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three, one thousand four ...” (as it is more comfortable)
• Hold your breath for a count of one thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three, one thousand four...
• Now exhale to the count of one thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three, one thousand four...
• now hold your breath again, counting one thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three, one thousand four...

Scheme of square breathing: inhale (4 sec) - hold the breath (4 sec) - exhale (4 sec) - hold (4 sec) - repeat from the beginning. Moreover, the duration of inhalation-exhalation can be selected individually, it can be 4 seconds, maybe more - 6-8 seconds, or less, the main thing is that it is comfortable to perform the exercise.

Diaphragmatic breathing

When a person is worried, nervous, his breathing becomes rapid and intermittent (a person breathes from the chest). A little explanation: there are several types of breathing. Most people expand the middle part of the sternum when they breathe. This is chest breathing. If breathing is carried out by the upper part of the sternum - high costal breathing. However, more useful and effective for calming and relaxing is diaphragmatic breathing, that is, breathing with the participation of the diaphragm, breathing with the stomach. In order to calm down and get rid of stress, we take a deep breath, absorbing a large volume of air, and then exhale it slowly. This is called very deep breathing. Such for many will be an effective tool for excitement and nervousness. In order to learn to breathe with the diaphragm, you must adhere to the following recommendations:

1. Lie on your back and place a book on your stomach. It is necessary to breathe so that the book rises from the breath.
2. Sit in a comfortable position, straighten your posture and lower right hand on the stomach, and the left - put the chest. Breathe in such a way that only the right hand moves.
3. It is desirable that the inhalation and exhalation be equal in time. For this, it is most convenient to count the beats of your heart. 4-6 strokes inhale - the same exhale.
4. To enhance the effect, you can repeat the affirmation to yourself: “With every breath I relax, with every exhalation I smile”

"Byaka-zakalyaka"

The technique is simple, but very effective in the fight not only with excitement, but with other negative emotions and experiences. It can be attributed to art therapy, and the implementation takes from 5 to 15 minutes. Instructions:

• take a pen or pencil, a sheet of clean paper, or rather several at once, because with strong emotions one may not be enough.
• as a rule, excitement is physically felt in a specific part of the body: in the chest, in the abdomen, in the head, in the form of spasms, clamps, or simply indefinite discomfort, i.e. you need to determine the localization of your destructive emotion;
• mentally give yourself the setting that all the excitement through your hands goes to paper, leaves your body, and does not return; there are no strict recommendations here, everything is done in an arbitrary form, as you like it better;
• you just start to drive a pencil or pen on paper without controlling your movements. If you do everything right, the hand itself will begin to draw all sorts of lines, “bad-hards”, write out all sorts of pretzels; do until you feel relieved, until you get the feeling that enough is enough (if one sheet is hardened, feel free to take the next one);
• then you need to get rid of the painted “masterpiece” in any convenient way: you can tear it into small pieces and flush it down the toilet, you can burn it and scatter the ashes in the wind, crush, trample and send it to the trash can, or come up with your own way - the main thing is to get rid of your “negative creations."
• enjoy the relief, it usually comes fairly quickly.

This technique is quite versatile, with its help you can get rid of excitement, irritation, resentment, worries, any stress. For a longer-term effect, you need to repeat more often.

Contact with water

One of the simplest and available ways calm down, especially if you are very nervous and worried - this is any contact with water. Scientists have long noted that the noise and contemplation of running, flowing water, the sound of waves soothes, relieves fatigue, promotes deep relaxation. So, if you need to calm down quickly, you need to:

• drink a glass of plain water in small sips - unbelievable, but it helps;
• go to the bathroom, turn on the water, hold your hands under running water, for as long as possible;
• wash the dishes, the floor, anything else;

When there is a little more time:

• take a shower, the most effective contrast;
• take a bath with hydromassage, if possible;
• go to the pool, to the lake, swim (double effect: the calming effect of water + physical activity);
• go out into nature, sit by the stream, by the river, look at the water.
• walk in the rain without an umbrella; not suitable for everyone, because there is a danger of catching a cold, but the effect is amazing. Whoever accidentally gets wet in the rain knows that then you come home, and your heart is joyful, it is not clear why, problems fade into the background, just like in childhood, when you got into a puddle up to your ankles, and you are satisfied ...

During physical activity, certain chemicals are released in the body, which explains the usefulness of physical activity for the mental state of a person. These chemicals include endorphins. Their action is similar to that of opiates - they dull pain and induce a state of calm and tranquility. Another substance - dopamine is an antidepressant, also produced by the body during physical activity. Improving the psychological state thanks to physical activity based on a physiological basis, and this is a scientific fact.

The positive effect persists for several hours after the “physical exercise”, or rather after the “after physical exercise”. Most available species motor activity:

• general cleaning of the apartment;
• hand washing, washing floors, windows;
• dancing;
• yoga practice;
• walking, running, cycling.

Meditation

Meditation techniques are the most popular and easy to master. They have been studied enough in terms of relaxation and a positive effect on physical and psychological health.

Many people think that meditation takes a long time and don't even try it. effective method. Here are some of the shortest and most effective meditations that will help you quickly calm down and not be nervous.

Exercise: track your own thoughts

Find a quiet place where no one will disturb you, close your eyes. For 5 to 10 minutes, just observe the thoughts that come to your mind. At the same time, the main thing is not to do anything, not to strain (even mentally) - you just need to observe. Allow your thoughts to simply come and go, without any evaluation of what is happening. Most likely, there will be complete confusion and a mess in your head, a heap of sensations, memories, situations, assessments, your own and other people's statements. This is fine.

Already after the first minutes of this exercise, you will notice that thoughts slow down, you become more calm. For a certain moment you abstract from everything, you become just an observer. After a while, you will begin to notice that there are small pauses between thoughts. During these periods of thoughtlessness, you can experience real peace and tranquility.

Calm Reflex Technique

This technique was proposed by psychologist Charles Strebel. The author claims that this technique allows you to relax very quickly, with systematic training in 6 seconds. So, the technique itself:

• Focus on what's bothering you.
• Smile to yourself. This will help relieve tension from the muscles of the face.
• Say to yourself: “My body is relaxed and my mind is actively awake.”
• Breathe in easily and calmly.
• When exhaling, relax and lower the lower jaw - when correct execution upper and lower teeth should not touch
• Imagine how heaviness and warmth spread through your body from the top of your head to your heels.

Method "Instant calm"

1. Continuous breathing. Despite the appearance of excitement, continue to breathe calmly, evenly and deeply.
2. Positive facial expression. As soon as you feel that you are starting to get nervous, smile slightly.
3. Appearance. Imagine that you are being lifted by a string - straighten your chest, stretch your neck, lift your chin.
4. Send a wave of relaxation to tense parts of the body.
5. Soberly assess the situation, tell yourself: “Everything that is happening now is real, and I will find the best solution”

Meditative Breathing: Basic Exercise

The technique of pure observation of one's breathing is simple and effective at the same time, does not require special skills, the state of relaxation and calm comes quickly, in a few minutes. Close your eyes, get comfortable, and just watch your breath. You should not strain, try to influence the rhythm or depth of breathing - just watch. Concentrate on how the air enters the lungs through the nostrils - then exits back. Inhale - exhale. This is the simplest technique applicable in almost any situation. After a while, you will be able to notice how your breathing becomes slower and calmer. The more consciously and attentively you observe your breathing, the faster you will feel calm.

Stress is haunting modern man literally at every step, which is why it is important to learn how to remain calm and composure in any situation. It is not always easy to pull yourself together and calm down without the help of sedatives, but if you wish, with the help of special exercises recommended by psychologists and regular practice, you can strengthen the nervous system and bring the body to a stable state.

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Why does stress occur?

In anticipation important events a person has a feeling of anxiety, nervousness increases, and as a result he experiences stress. Most often, discomfort is preceded by the following situations:

• problems at work;
• family troubles;
• impending important events, such as an exam, public speaking, etc.

Nervousness has both psychological and physiological causes. Physiology is connected with the nervous system, and on the part of psychology, a person may suffer from a feeling of self-doubt, have a tendency to experiences of a different nature, and excitement for the expected result sometimes also affects.

Some people are constantly in a state of anxiety: as soon as difficult situation getting better, they will certainly have another cause for alarm. All life takes place in incessant stress, which negatively affects mood, physical condition and self-esteem.

A person who is able to get annoyed for any reason does not know how to control and control emotions, this spoils relationships at home, in a team at work, etc.

Anxiety can arise even for no apparent reason. Nervousness usually appears in situations that a person considers dangerous or significant for himself. In everyday life, the main cause of stress is the fear of failure and the fear of appearing in front of others in an unsightly light. To calm down and pull yourself together, you need to determine the cause of nervousness, and only then proceed to eliminate it.

The most effective ways to deal with anxiety

To stop being nervous, to find peace in the soul and start living calmly will help actionable recommendations specialists in the field of psychology. It is important to understand that the tendency to nervousness is not a natural reaction of the body to stressful situation, but a banal habit that you can get rid of.

Proven ways to take your mind off things:

Psychologists' advice	Guide to action
Analyze your own fears	The cause of most fears is self-doubt. To start changing your life better side, you should carefully analyze all fears and acknowledge their existence. It is recommended to make a list of problems. On the left, write situations that can be changed, on the right - unsolvable. This approach will allow you to calm down, because there is no point in worrying and fearing everything in vain if you cannot change anything. It's also pointless to worry if the problem is solvable.
Think back to childhood	Many of the problems present in adult life are rooted in deep childhood. If the parents set the child as an example of the neighboring children and did not notice his merits, in 99 cases out of 100 people grow up unsure of themselves. In such a situation, you need to understand that all people are different. Each has its own merits and demerits. It is necessary to accept yourself with all imperfections and sincerely love
Good rest	A day of rest and maximum relaxation will help stop driving, freaking out and worrying about trifles. The fast pace of life makes it impossible to take a break. The result is constant stress. You need to disconnect from duties for a while and arrange a day off: read a book, watch TV shows, take a walk on fresh air, sleep well, get up, not on an alarm clock, but when you want, take a bath with aromatic oils and soothing herbs, pamper yourself with sweets. On this day, it is recommended to do what you love, for which there is not enough time in the normal rhythm of life, and just enjoy life.
Cook or order your favorite dish	Food is a powerful source of pleasure. delicious food – great way stop worrying and worrying over trifles. The main thing is not to overdo it so that excess weight does not add to the existing problem.
To watch a movie	Watching movies is a good way to have a great time alone or with friends, allowing you to temporarily abstract from pressing problems.
Get rid of the source of stress	Not always a person can afford a whole day of good rest. This recommendation will help you become calm in the short term. To overcome negative thoughts, stop getting angry and annoyed, you need to take a break for a few minutes and just do nothing during this time
Speak the problem out loud	Sometimes a person just needs to be heard. In this case the best way out the situation will become a discussion of a disturbing situation with a loved one
To walk outside	Fresh air saturates the body with oxygen and serves as an excellent panacea for anxiety and stress. During lunch break or after work, it is recommended to take a walk in the fresh air. You can get a couple of stops to your house and walk
Engage in physical exercise	Physical activity has a beneficial effect on the psycho-emotional state. Scientists have proven that a person who is actively involved in sports is able to withstand stress and control their own emotions. A morning jog, 20-minute exercise, dancing or yoga can do wonders for mood and self-esteem. Even if you are too lazy to go in for sports, initially you just need to force yourself, then it will become a habit
sleep well	Dream - the best medicine from all diseases. Chronic lack of sleep becomes a source of ongoing stress. A person needs to sleep at least 7-8 hours a day

Learning to live and respond in a new way is quite possible if you constantly practice resting properly. It takes 21 days for a person to master new skills, then the discomfort will disappear, and the habit will become a part of everyday life.



How to calm down before an exam

During the exam, many people worry too much, which negatively affects the future mark. The human brain is focused not on the correct answer, but on the fear of failure. Fear of failure prevents action, paralyzes.

The following tips will help you stay in control:

1. 1. Stop thinking about failure as the end of the world. You need to pass the exam, but life will not end, and the world will not collapse if the teacher does not count the answer.
2. 2. It is recommended to draw up a plan for preparing for the exam in advance and strictly follow it, then the probability of failure will be minimal. Thorough preparation will add confidence, so that anxiety during the process will be much less.
3. 3. In the evening before the exam, you should refresh all the information in your memory by briefly going over the main theses. It is better to go to bed a little earlier to rest and gain strength before the crucial stage.
4. 4. Active rest, sports and physical work will help to distract from obsessive thoughts and stop immersing yourself in a stressful situation. Even a small charge can switch thoughts in a different direction and give the brain the opportunity to rest.
5. 5. It is recommended to take a shower before leaving the house. The sound and feel of flowing water is great for relieving tension and helping to cool emotions.



Express help: how to quickly pull yourself together in a stressful situation

When overwhelmed by sad thoughts, fear of the future and other negative emotions you can use the following techniques:

Way	Description
	If irritation, anger, anger, fear overcome or you are very nervous in the middle of the day, it is recommended to use the following technique: turn on the tap and just watch how the jet flows. A glass of water, drunk slowly, works better than the strongest antidepressants and brings you to life
Special breathing technique	Breathing in a certain rhythm allows you to quickly recover and calm down. You need to breathe as follows: inhale for 4 counts, hold the breath in yourself for 2 counts and exhale smoothly for 4 counts. Only you need to breathe not with your chest, but with a diaphragm, that is, with your stomach
	This method is especially good when you want to throw out anger and other negative emotions on another person. In this case, you need to take a breath and mentally count to ten.
Write a letter	The most effective way to overcome stress and release negative emotions is to write a letter. After all the troubles are imprinted on the sheet, you should tear it into small pieces and burn it, imagining how all real problems are burned along with the paper.
cry	Negative emotions just need an outlet. Sometimes you don't have to hold back tears to calm down. Crying will help you quickly and effectively relieve stress and remove toxic substances from the body.

How to stay calm during an important meeting

If neither the emotional mood, nor the breathing practices, nor other methods work, and the excitement is still present when talking with an important person or people, one should depict external calmness and equanimity.

Demonstration of outer peace helps to find inner harmony and relax during an important meeting. Not only well-being determines facial expressions, this rule works flawlessly in the opposite direction. It is recommended to smile, follow gestures and avoid closed positions- this will allow you to arrange the interlocutor to yourself and tune in with him on the same wavelength.

Folk recipes

If the above methods did not give the desired effect, they will come to the rescue folk remedies. Herbal preparations will help calm the nerves at home - they do not have a negative impact on health, unlike medications.

Herbal preparations are considered stronger, which can be purchased at any pharmacy or prepared independently. This will require the following ingredients:

• valerian root;
• sweet clover;
• dried hawthorn flowers;
• peppermint leaves;
• hop cones;
• motherwort.

A spoonful of the mixture should be poured with 0.4 liters of boiling water and let it brew. It is recommended to drink tea before going to bed.

but medicinal herbs can be used not only in the form of tea, one more effective remedy against stress - fragrant sachet pads. It is recommended to place them anywhere at home, and if necessary, take them with you to work or carry them in a car.

A glass of warm milk with a teaspoon of honey will also help to calm down in the middle of the day.

How to stop worrying - What to do if the excitement does not recede?

- When do we get nervous?

- When do we get nervous?
- 7 lessons on how to stop being nervous
How to calm down right now
- How to get rid of anxiety - instructions for action
How to stop anxiety?
- Conclusion

Nervousness and jitters is that feeling of discomfort that you experience on the eve of important, responsible events and events, during psychological stress and stress, in problematic life situations, and you just worry about every little thing.

It is important to understand that nervousness has both psychological and physiological causes and manifests itself accordingly. Physiologically, this is connected with the properties of our nervous system, and psychologically, with the characteristics of our personality: a tendency to experience, overestimation of the significance of certain events, a sense of insecurity in oneself and what is happening, shyness, excitement for the result.

We begin to get nervous in situations that we consider either dangerous, threatening our lives, or, for one reason or another, significant, responsible. I think that the threat to life, not so often looms before us, the townsfolk. Therefore, I consider situations of the second kind to be the main reason for nervousness in everyday life.

The fear of failing, of looking inappropriate in front of people, all of these make us nervous. In relation to these fears, there is a certain psychological setting, it has little to do with our physiology.

Therefore, in order to stop being nervous, it is necessary not only to put the nervous system in order, but to understand and realize certain things, let's start with understanding the nature of nervousness.

- 7 lessons on how to stop being nervous

Lesson 1. The nature of nervousness. required defense mechanism or a hindrance?

a) Nervousness does not bring any benefit, but only hinders.
b) You can get rid of it by working on yourself.
c) In everyday life, there are few real reasons to be nervous, since we or our loved ones are rarely threatened, mostly we worry about trifles.

Lesson 2 How to stop being nervous for any reason?

Think about all those events that plunge you into nervousness: your boss calls, you pass an exam, you expect an unpleasant conversation. Think about all these things, evaluate the degree of their importance to you, but not in isolation, but within the context of your life, your global plans and prospects.

At such moments, focus on the purpose of your life, think about the future, distract from the current moment.

Such a psychological setting helps a lot to stop being nervous for any reason.

Lesson 3 Training. How to calm down before a responsible event.

Free your head from thoughts, relax your body, exhale deeply and inhale. The most ingenuous will help to relax breathing exercises.
It should be done like this:

a) inhale for 4 counts (or 4 beats of the pulse, you must first feel it, it is more convenient to do this on the neck, and not on the wrist)
b) hold your breath for 2 counts/beats
c) exhale for 4 counts/beats
d) hold your breath for 2 counts/beats and then inhale again for 4 counts/beats - all over again

Breath! Do not breath. 4 seconds inhale - 2 seconds hold - 4 seconds exhale - 2 seconds hold.

If you feel that breathing allows you to take deeper breaths / exhalations, then do the cycle not 4/2 seconds but 6/3 or 8/4 and so on.

Lesson 4 How to deal with nervousness during an important meeting.

a) Act calm.
b) Pay attention to facial expressions, gestures and intonation.
c) Eliminate all markers of nervousness.
d) Take your time.

Lesson 5 We calm down after the meeting.

Whatever the outcome of the event. You are on edge and still experiencing stress. Better take it off and think about something else. Try not to think too much about the past event. Just get rid of all thoughts from your head, get rid of the subjunctive mood (if only), everything has already passed, put your breath in order and relax your body.

Lesson 6 There should be no reason to be nervous at all.

Usually a significant factor in nervousness is the discrepancy between your preparation for the upcoming event. When you know everything, are confident in yourself, then why should you worry about the result?

We must try not to create stress factors for ourselves in the future! Think ahead and prepare for business and important meetings, do everything on time and do not delay until the last moment! Always have a ready-made plan in your head, and preferably a few! This will save you a significant part of the nerve cells, and in general will contribute to great success in life.

Lesson 7 How to strengthen the nervous system and how to stop being nervous over trifles.

In order to stop being nervous, you must also bring the body and mind to a state of rest.

a) One should meditate regularly.
b) Go in for sports and carry out a complex of measures that support recovery (contrast shower, healthy eating, vitamins, etc.). Sport strengthens the nervous system.
c) Walk more, spend time outdoors, try to sit less in front of the computer.
d) Practice breathing exercises.
e) Throw bad habits!

How to calm down right now

Stressful situations, worries and unreasonable anxiety haunt people all their lives, but in order to become happy, you only need to prioritize correctly. You should not take everything “to heart”, for many this statement does not give anything, they do not know how to stop worrying and continue to be nervous. Helping yourself and your friends in this problem is very simple, learn how to overcome your fear and be happy right at the moment, no matter what happens.

1) Perceive yourself and your actions with optimism.

A sense of duty and responsibility for one's actions is instilled from childhood, some parents, having overdone a little, inspire a person with their complexes and constant feeling guilt, hence the feeling of constant worry for their words and actions. To overcome this, you need to convince yourself of the correctness of your actions, and also adhere to the following rules:

a) Relieve yourself of guilt.
b) Get rid of imaginary problems.
c) Get rid of fear.
d) Be yourself.

2) Believe only in the best.

An assessment of a problem or incident that has arisen should be made only after it happens, in order to foresee the course of the event, it is better to immediately consider what could happen in the worst case. Having put everything “on the shelves”, it may turn out that there is nothing terrible in the future, everything is explainable and solvable. To eliminate such concerns, you need to determine for yourself:

a) Goals in life.
b) Prioritize.
c) An interesting case.

3) Appreciate what you have.

It is impossible to expect something more from life and not to make efforts for this, ideal conditions will not be created by themselves. Of course, sometimes favorable circumstances arise, and then only it is worth using them correctly, and unfortunately rarely anyone can do this. Most often, opportunities are hidden under far-fetched problems; after their solution, ways to solve problems are immediately visible.

Take note of a few tips:

a) Live for today.
b) Limit contact with unpleasant people.
c) Don't pay attention to the little things in life.

4) Don't feel sorry for yourself.

You won’t be able to stop worrying right away, but by following the tips in question, you can quickly cope with this difficult feeling and achieve any goals, as well as infect others with your optimism. The main thing to remember is that all thoughts are material, their execution gives a joyful mood and faith in a better future, for which it is worth living.

- How to get rid of anxiety - instructions for action

Tip 1. Don't fight the excitement.

During periods of great excitement, do not try to get rid of this condition.

This struggle sometimes takes more strength than simple excitement. Therefore, instead of fighting with excitement, accept it, feel it, find the reason for your excitement, and then you will feel better.
Also find advantages in an exciting situation, and then it will become much easier for you.

Tip 2. Go in for sports!

The excitement caused by fear binds every muscle in our body.

In such situations, overcoming anxiety is quite simple! You just need to give your body a physical shake-up. When endorphin rushes into your body, the excitement will noticeably recede.

Tip 3. Don't worry about trifles.

Very often we worry about a fictional situation.

For example, we didn’t have time to submit a report today and we begin to worry that tomorrow it will be too late. But you can just tell the boss that the work on the report was a little delayed.

However, in reality, we ourselves complicate our lives.

Tip 4. Breathing helps in the fight against anxiety.

Try Herry Herminson's Balloon Breathing Exercise.

Sit down, close your eyes and imagine a tennis ball in front of you. Take a slow and deep breath, imagining how the ball slowly and smoothly moves from the stomach to the throat. Exhale - and the ball moves down just as slowly.

After doing 10 repetitions, you will noticeably relax and be able to overcome the excitement.

Tip 5 Stay positive and stop worrying.

During periods of unrest, we are often overwhelmed by phrases such as: “I can’t”, “I’m a loser”, “I will definitely embarrass myself”, etc. But know - these phrases are just limiters in our brain.

Repeating to yourself day after day about failures, you really become a failure.
That's why start programming yourself right!

Tell yourself:

a) I will do it!
b) I am the best!
c) I can do everything!

Many psychologists believe that the constant scrolling of positive phrases helps a person cope with anxiety and achieve their goals.

How to stop anxiety?

Here are some tips on how to stop worrying and start enjoying life right now!

1) Play a game of "what's the worst that can happen?" with yourself.
Imagine the worst case scenario so you can prepare for it or try to prevent it.

The second step is to imagine something for which you would be grateful even in an undesirable situation. This gratitude exercise teaches you not only to be prepared for the worst, but to see the positive in it!

And most importantly, if you can imagine the worst, you can imagine the best!

2) Get rid of the habit of worrying (yes, it's a habit!).
Get rid of thoughts that upset you and choose thoughts that focus on a positive outcome. Control your mind and stop worrying!

3) Be in the here and now.
You worry about what might happen in the future or what happened in the past. But the truth is that you are creating the future NOW! Therefore, if you want to stop worrying, your thoughts must be devoted to what is happening NOW. Concentrate and think, feel, act and speak the best way… from the point of view of the present. Such thoughts, feelings, actions and words improve your future!

4) Help others.
There are countless people who are much, much worse than you. Help them as much as you can. This will help you look at your own problems more objectively, develop a sense of gratitude, and you will not have time to think about your problems when you help other people (or animals, environment etc.).

5) Talk positively to yourself and about yourself.
How many times a day do you berate yourself for the mistakes you make? How many times a day can you say "I" along with something negative?

For example:

a) I am poor
b) I'm lonely
c) I can't do it
d) I will be rejected.

Don't talk like that! "I" is a word that has a strong energy! No need to exercise yourself with these life situations. When you eliminate such negativity from your speech, your mental state will improve and you will be less prone to anxiety. You will also be motivated to take positive action.

6) Action gives you confidence and control.
Take action. Think rationally, analyze the situation, weigh all the options and choose the best way actions based NOT on reflexes or emotions, but on the calm implementation of the steps necessary to improve the situation, on what you want - on the best scenario that you visualize.

Action keeps you active, helps you focus your mind away from worry, and makes you feel GOOD because you feel more in control of the situation, if only because you're doing it yourself.

- Conclusion

Almost every person on the plane has at least once experienced anxiety and anxiety. Some people experience this feeling all the time. Sometimes this anxiety has no basis, but a person still continues to wind himself up over trifles, losing precious time that he could spend on his self-development or on relatives and friends.

How often do you worry about things that are not worth your attention? And how to stop worrying for no reason?

First of all, you need to realize that your excitement will not bring you any benefit. Only harm. Train your confidence. Confident people almost never have a reason to worry.

And stop worrying about what is out of your control, it's useless. It is foolish to spend time on something that only spoils your mood, it is better to spend it on improving your skills and increasing your self-esteem.

The material was prepared by Dilyara specifically for the site