We give advice right and left that there is a way out of any unpleasant situation, and not even one. We tune in to the positive and try to console others that not everything is as bad as it seems at first glance. But when we ourselves are overcome by troubles that are coming from all sides, the advice that we ourselves offered looks simply ridiculous and helpless.
What to do in a difficult life situation, where you see one dead end? Exists actionable advice how to proceed in such a case.
1. First of all, try to calm down and stop. No need to quickly rush into the pool with your head and take incomprehensible actions that can lead to even bigger problems. You need to pause and decide where you are and how you ended up in this position. Take some time to think about why it turned out the way it did, and not completely different. When you can find the entrance, then you will find the exit in one moment.
2. Effective advice on how to get out of the impasse is to get rid of the emotions that overwhelm you at that moment. Fear, anger, disappointment interfere with normal concentration in front of the resulting problem. Often, our negative emotions, which take on a huge scale, we make an elephant out of a fly, and it’s done, we don’t see any way out, one dead end. If you want to smash something to smithereens - do it, if you want to scream and swear - go ahead, give vent to your anger, do not keep destructive energy in yourself.
3. When you are overcome by complete devastation, only then will bright thoughts begin to come into your head and everything will become clear from a different angle. Prepare yourself tea with lemon and ginger, or make yourself hot coffee, energy drinks will help your brain work faster. Take a piece of paper and start writing down absolutely all ideas for getting out of an impasse, even the most absurd ones, in such cases all means are good.
4. Do not think alone, seek help from your comrades and loved ones who have not turned away in difficult times. There is a proverb "One head is good, but two is better." Perhaps they will offer their own options that will be useful to you, because sometimes it is more visible from the outside.
5. The next step will be a full analysis of the proposed ideas. Consider all the pros and cons. Make three thorough plans to get out of the crisis. Plan A and B are the most effective, and Plan C is the back-up. Clearly thought-out scenarios, several options, give much more percentage of success than one.
6. In a difficult life situation, gather your strength and spirit and begin to put into action your anti-crisis plan. Going step by step, not stepping back, you will achieve what you want and get out of the troubles surrounding your life, and understanding what to do will come by itself.
7. In difficult times, people who care about you and to whom you are very dear will help you survive misfortunes. Don't push them away or isolate them from your society, let them help you. You can even ask them for help yourself, in such situations you understand who the most devoted and faithful people are.
8. In our life, we rely a lot on circumstances, while realizing that they do not bode well. You can't do that. We create our own destiny, so pull yourself together and do not let circumstances take over you.
9. Another in an efficient way how to get out of the impasse, is to exclude people with . In the environment of each person, there is sure to be such a person who will exaggerate and lower faith in yourself. Such people do not see happiness and good points, have them around one negative. If possible, avoid them, do not let them lower your self-esteem, otherwise, you will panic and give up.
10. When you are in trouble, look for something that will motivate you during the time that you get out of the current situation. Strive to associate with those who believe in you and know that you can withstand any blow.
11. In difficult moments, you should not be afraid to take risks and think about mistakes, everyone has them. It will be stupidity that you will sit idly by. Each of your mistakes will be a lesson from which you will draw useful and necessary information for yourself.
12. Do not listen to those who say that they know how you better live and be. They will constantly remind you and poke you for past mistakes. Send them away from you, let them hang noodles on the ears of others, the same losers as they are. This is your life and only you can decide if you can get out of trouble or not. Believe in yourself and you will succeed. You are not a loser, but a winner!
Do you know that the state provides assistance to its citizens who are in a difficult life situation? For example, if you need treatment outside the republic, and your family budget cannot afford it. They can also help a large family with food and clothing. But first things first, according to ysia.ru.
Where it is written: Decree of the Government of the Republic of Sakha (Yakutia) dated July 30, 2015 No. 253 “On approval of the Regulations on the provision of targeted financial assistance in the Republic of Sakha (Yakutia) to low-income families and low-income single citizens who are in a difficult life situation.”
Difficult situations are:
- if there are no funds for food and accommodation during a forced stay outside the place of residence in connection with the departure of the patient and accompanying the child or disabled person for examination, treatment and (or) rehabilitation in specialized institutions;
- if there are no funds to pay for medical services and medicines necessary for health reasons (for health reasons) provided in excess of the territorial program of state guarantees for the provision of free medical care to citizens of the Russian Federation;
- lack of funds for the purchase of food and clothing due to disability, large families, lack of work;
- Loss of a dwelling as a result of a fire.
How much will they give:
- for examination and treatment in specialized institutions outside the Republic of Sakha (Yakutia) in the direction of the Ministry of Health of the Republic of Sakha (Yakutia) in the amount of two times the subsistence minimum, provided that the average per capita income of the family is not higher than twice the subsistence minimum;
- if treatment, examination or rehabilitation in specialized institutions lasts more than 2 months, then in the amount of the subsistence minimum, provided that the average per capita income of the family is not higher than 1.5 times the subsistence minimum;
- to pay for medical services and medicines in the amount of actually incurred expenses, but not more than 1.5 times the subsistence minimum, provided that the average per capita income of a family and a citizen living alone is not higher than 1.5 times the subsistence minimum;
- to pay for living expenses outside the place of residence for disabled people who are on permanent dialysis treatment, in the amount of five times the subsistence minimum, provided that the average per capita income of the family and a citizen living alone is not higher than two times the subsistence minimum;
- for the purchase of food, clothing:
1) a family with less than 3 minor family members, in the amount of 0.5 of the subsistence minimum per family;
2) families with 3 or more minor family members, in the amount of the subsistence minimum;
3) a citizen living alone in the amount of 0.5 of the subsistence minimum.
Provided that the average per capita income of a family and a citizen living alone is not higher than the subsistence level.
- for the purchase of essential goods for fire victims:
1) for completely lost housing in the amount of three times the subsistence minimum per family and for each affected family member in the amount of 0.5 of the subsistence minimum, but not more than five times the subsistence minimum;
2) for partially lost living quarters in the amount of two times the subsistence minimum per family.
If the average per capita income of a family and a citizen living alone is not higher than 2 times the subsistence level.
How many times?
Targeted financial assistance is of a one-time nature and is provided to the applicant on one basis once a year. Dialysis patients receive assistance twice a year.
How to get a?
It is necessary to apply with an application to the Department of Social Protection of Population and Labor at the place of registration or at the place of stay in person, by mail, in electronic form.
When will you get help?
The Commission considers the application within 30 days from the date of registration of the applicant's written application and decides on the provision of targeted financial assistance or on refusal and notifies the applicant of the decision.
Required documents:
— a copy of the passport or a copy of another identity document;
- a certificate of family composition (in the absence of registration, documents confirming the actual residence are submitted);
- birth certificates for minors and passports for adult family members living together;
- certificates of adoption (adoption), marriage, divorce;
- certificates confirming the income of family members of a citizen for the last three calendar months preceding the month of filing an application for a one-time targeted financial assistance;
- certificate of disability (if there is a disability);
- a copy of the TIN;
- account details.
If you need money for treatment:
a) a call for treatment to a medical institution of the Russian Federation;
b) referral to a specialized institution of the Russian Federation or the Republic of Sakha (Yakutia);
c) documents confirming the examination, treatment and (or) rehabilitation in specialized healthcare institutions or institutions social services RF and RS(Y).
To receive assistance for the purchase of medicines, the provision of medical services:
a) a certificate or an extract from the medical commission of a medical institution with the appointment of medical services and medicines necessary for health reasons;
b) receipts, cash and sales receipts.
Dialysis specialist:
a) a certificate confirming the conduct of dialysis sessions (issued by a medical institution conducting dialysis treatment);
b) information from the body that carries out state registration of rights to real estate and transactions with it at the place of dialysis treatment, on the rights of an individual to real estate objects he/she has (have) for family members according to a certificate of family composition;
c) a tenancy agreement.
Fire victims:
a) an act on a fire of an authorized state body of the fire service;
b) a certificate of state registration of the right to a dwelling or another document certifying the ownership of a dwelling.
For unemployed citizens and non-working adult family members:
a) work book;
b) a certificate from the employment service authorities on the registration or absence of vacancies at the place of residence of the citizen.
According to the Ministry of Labor and social development RS(I)
Read also the latest news on social support of citizens
For the second year, social protection pays benefits for the first and third (subsequent) children born or adopted in the period from January 2018. How many families have applied for this benefit? What is its size? These and other questions are answered by Svetlana SOBOLEVA, Deputy Head of the...
Residents of Yakutia are demanding a return to the previous retirement age for residents of the northern territories. Almost 66.5 thousand signatures have been collected in the republic for these changes to be implemented, the press service told a REGNUM correspondent. republican federation trade unions.
Russian authorities plan to require the parents of students to pay them a minimum amount of financial support. Many experts believe that the initiative of officials enshrined in law will be the first step towards the abolition of scholarships. In their opinion, this may deprive many children from ...
From January 2018 to January of the current year, 2,373 families received a payment at the birth or adoption of the first child up to the age of 1.5 years.
Social support specialists told Sakhalin residents about what kind of support measures families with children can expect from the region. The meeting was attended by representatives of the mortgage agency, the head of the housing policy department, Elena Fedotova, and the head of the family policy department, Olesya Kononova.
Large-scale reform of the Russian payment system social benefits may start earlier than expected. When assigning benefits, officials plan to take into account the expenses of citizens, reporters from the Russian News section of the Birzhevoy...
In the life of each of us there are difficult life situations, and we all react to troubles in our own way and look for a way out of a difficult situation in different ways. Some put up and adapting "go with the flow." Others are looking for a way out of a difficult life situation with the help of actions aimed at overcoming problems and troubles. Someone withdraws into himself and instead of trying to somehow overcome the difficulty, he prefers not to notice it. And many, cursing fate, only complain about a difficult life and, in fact, without solving any problems, fall into depression.
It is possible to generalize the behavior of people in difficult situations and describe ways of overcoming difficulties according to the transformation strategies that are used in these situations: co-ownership (adaptation and overcoming), protection and experience. But before we talk about them in detail, a few words about the concept of "difficult life situation".
So the concept of "difficult life situation" is interpreted by one of the Federal Laws of the Russian Federation - " Difficult life situation - this is a situation that directly disrupts the life of a person, which he is not able to overcome on his own". This law also gives several examples of difficult life situations - illness, disability, orphanhood, unemployment, insecurity and poverty, lack of a fixed place of residence, abuse, conflicts, loneliness, etc.
Russian psychotherapist, Fedor Efimovich Vasilyuk, who studies aspects of difficult life situations, suggests understanding them as situations of impossibility in which a person faces the difficulty of realizing internal needs his life (aspirations, motives, values, etc.).
A difficult life situation is always characterized by a discrepancy between what we want (to achieve, do, etc.) and what we can. Such a discrepancy between desires and abilities and capabilities prevents the achievement of goals, and this entails the emergence negative emotions, which signal the emergence of a difficult situation. A developing person, mastering and learning the world around him, but not possessing sufficient life experience , inevitably meet with something unexpected, unknown and new. The use of one's own abilities and capabilities in this situation may not be enough, therefore it can cause disappointment. And any difficult life situation leads to disruption of activity, deterioration of existing relations with the people around us, gives rise to experiences and bad emotions, causes various inconveniences, which can have negative consequences for the development of the individual. Therefore, a person should know as much as possible about options and ways.
Behavior Techniques People Most Often Use in Difficult Situations
Defense techniques - a group of non-adaptive (behavior that contributes to the emergence of severe mental distress) reactions to difficulties: depression, silent humility, depression, as well as avoiding difficult life situations and suppressing thoughts about the cause and source of the difficulty.
Overcoming - actions aimed at achieving success, changing and overcoming difficulties. They are associated with the expenditure of energy and with certain efforts; involves intense reflection aimed at solving a difficult situation, high level mental self-regulation, searching for the necessary information and involving other people in solving the problem.
Persistently transforming any difficult situation, a person changes a lot, but often these changes are unconscious and unintentional. However, sometimes the situation requires a conscious change in its characteristics, only in this case it is possible to achieve well-being and overcome difficulty. In this case, changing personal properties and attitudes to a difficult situation becomes the main strategy or an important component of another strategy.
DEVICE RECEPTIONS
Adapting to the Basic Moments of the Situation(social attitudes, social norms, rules of business relations, etc.). Having mastered this technique, a person freely enters the world of morality and law, labor, culture, family relations. In normal social conditions, this technique determines success. For example, it helps to get used to new working conditions (in this case, a person successfully passes a probationary period) or in case of moving to a new place of residence. However, if a person got into a difficult situation, in a situation of upheaval, when something has changed dramatically, where new rules have not yet been formed, and the old ones no longer apply - this technique will not help.- Adaptation to the characteristics and needs of others will be of great importance in a situation of social upheaval. The study of this technique showed that it is most often used in the crisis stages of the development of society. Next to it is another method of adaptation - concern for maintaining the existing establishment of new social contacts.
- Choose a role for yourself and act in accordance with it. This technique is used by people in situations where the source of experiences and difficulties is their personal qualities and properties of its own character (for example, self-doubt or shyness), not allowing them to freely adapt to new living conditions, ask for help, etc. This technique consists in the conscious application of the identification mechanism. A person chooses to imitate a certain behavior model, it can be a movie character or a book character, personifying confidence, well, or a friend who has this missing quality. In a difficult life situation, he tries on the role of this character: he begins to behave differently, his gait, manner of speaking, his speech becomes persuasive He even begins to feel differently. Since he does not fully identify himself with the chosen role, but only “plays it,” he attributes all his failures and awkwardness to the chosen character, and not to himself. It helps to avoid embarrassment, to be more free from the opinions of others and do not reduce self-esteem when misses. At right choice role, it helps to cope with a difficult situation that arises in communication, and also causes tangible shifts not only in behavior, but also in one's own life values and attitudes.
- A commonly used form of adaptation is identification with more successful people or identification with serious and influential associations and organizations. People who have suffered disappointments and failures, who think they are a loser, sometimes resort to this technique. By identifying with a successful subject, they, as it were, add special abilities to themselves, and becoming an employee of an influential and authoritative organization, they not only get the opportunity to feel that they belong to it and talk about “our successes”, but also really begin to feel strong and act more successfully and effectively. confidently.
- Technique for identifying the boundaries of one's own capabilities, as a rule, is used with a sudden change in life circumstances. The most striking example is a person who has become disabled. Once in such a difficult life situation, people are forced to drastically change their established way of life. At first, they learn about their capabilities. As a man walking through a swamp probes the ground, they analyze the measure of their remaining abilities and try to make up for what they have lost. It is worth noting that those who find themselves in unknown or complicated conditions also resort to house tactics.
- Foresight and anticipation of events. This technique is used by people who have already had a sad experience of failure or are waiting for the imminent onset of an approaching difficult life situation (for example, a layoff, an upcoming operation, or the death of a sick relative). Anticipatory sadness or preconceived notions are adaptive and allow the person to mentally prepare for possible difficult trials and make a plan to prevent unfortunate circumstances. Like any other method of coping with a difficult situation, anticipatory coping, depending on a particular situation, can be both beneficial and harmful.
(+) An example of the productive use of anticipatory coping is the experience often used in some foreign hospitals in preparing young patients for the intended operation. Medical staff under the guidance of a qualified psychologist arrange special role-playing games, during which the situation of the operation is played. Similar psychological preparation reduces the fear of children before surgery and significantly accelerate their recovery.
(-) A clear example of a uniquely unproductive anticipatory coping is the so-called "symptom of St. Lazarus", psychologists have identified it when working with some relatives of HIV-infected people. It consists in such an attitude towards the patient, as if he is already dead and mourned (sometimes it comes to the point that family members avoid all communication with the sick person, openly collect money for a wake and prepare for his funeral).
AUXILIARY METHODS OF SELF-PRESERVATION IN DIFFICULT LIFE SITUATIONS
These are methods of dealing with emotional failures, which, according to the subject, occur in connection with insurmountable difficult situations.
- This is escape from a difficult situation. It occurs not only in physical, but also in a purely psychological form - by suppressing thoughts about the situation and internal alienation from it (this may be a refusal to promotions, from other tempting offers). For people who have survived a large number of various failures and disappointments, such avoidance of dubious relationships and situations often becomes a personality trait. For them, it is the last line of defense.
- Rejection and rejection, traumatic, stunning and tragic event - another common method of self-preservation. Getting into a difficult life situation and faced with tragedy, rejection and denial of it, a person builds a psychological barrier on the way of penetration into his inner world of this traumatic and destructive event. He gradually digests it in small doses.
Techniques overcoming difficulties with the help of adaptation and transformation can be both secondary and basic for a person, both situation-specific and characteristic. The situation-specific are: "resistance", "adjustment of one's expectations", "hope", "use of chance", "self-affirmation", "identification with the fates and goals of other people", "relying on other people", "postponing the satisfaction of one's own needs”, “the manifestation of aggression in the form of action or unfounded criticism" and etc.
TECHNIQUES TO USE IN CASES OF FAIL
Here will be given the techniques that people use in the case when for overcoming difficult life situations there is no way to solve them. That is, a person who has fallen into an unpleasant situation has made every effort to somehow solve it, but the problem remains unresolved and he has no other choice but to simply admit that he has failed. He experiences this defeat as a collapse of his personality, because he set himself a difficult task, put so much effort, hoped, and even saw her solution as part of a future life. If a person has not experienced major failures and failures up to this time, he is overly vulnerable. In such a situation, a person tries in any way to maintain or restore a good attitude towards himself, a sense of his own well-being and dignity.
Most often in such cases, people try to discount failure by using mechanisms psychological protection, which help to reduce the burden of emotional experiences and do not require them to painfully reconsider their attitude towards themselves. Among these methods are:
- Object depreciation. Failing to find way out of a difficult situation, in this case failing to achieve important goal(get married, go to college, defend a dissertation, etc.), a person lowers its significance. Thus, he discounts his failure (" Do I need it?», « It's not the most important thing in life”) and writes the difficult situation into his biography as an insignificant episode.
- Adjusting your hopes and aspirations. Since failure for most people is an unpleasant and difficult event that deprives a person of what he needs, he can resort to correcting hopes and expectations. Often this leads to minimization of needs. Of course, this method saves from failures, smoothes discomfort and experiences, but it impoverishes the future and in no way increases the respect of oneself as a person.
- Acceptance is the acceptance of a situation as it really is. In psychology, this technique is sometimes called "patience" or even more often they use the phrase "let go of the situation" (i.e. stop actions that do not bring results to change a difficult situation). This is not a silent response to difficult life circumstances, but a conscious decision made after analyzing the life situation and comparing one's own plight with the even worse situation of other people. This technique can be applied in a situation of disability or serious illness.
- Positive interpretation of your situation. This technique is similar to the previous one. It consists in using comparison options: people compare themselves with someone who is in an even more precarious position (“comparison goes down”), or recalls their merits and successes in other areas: “Yes, I didn’t succeed, but…” (“the comparison goes up”). Remember, one of the heroines of the popular film by E. Ryazanov “Office Romance” had such defensive phrases: “ I live outside the city, but next to the train», « My husband had a stomach ulcer, but Vishnevsky did the operation himself" etc.
In the life of each of us there are difficult life situations. Even in the most serene times, we face difficulties. For one it is a job search or a change of residence, for another it is their own illness or illness. loved one, divorce or death of loved ones and relatives. So it was and always will be. Difficult life situations arise in the lives of children and adults, entire families and nations.
This article presents techniques and techniques largely related to adaptation to circumstances that can no longer be changed. There are opinions that such techniques indicate a passive strategy and an inability to cope with one's life. But in reality, everything is not so simple, because sometimes a temporary adaptation acts as a wise strategy for experiencing a difficult life situation, taking into account life prospects with their real features.
The simplest example is probationary period for employment dictates to a person the rules of the game to which he must adapt in order to get a job in good location and to be accepted in the new labor collective. He knows, When is it better to be silent?, refuses self-affirmation and certain forms of behavior in favor of its future.
However, everyone has the right to independently choose those techniques and strategies from their repertoire that will help get out of a difficult life situation. Not always and not all of us are able to change. The most we can do is to take a sober look at the situation, focus our best efforts on changing what can be improved, and find ways to coexist with what cannot be changed.
If you find an error, please highlight a piece of text and click Ctrl+Enter.
Mixed Personality Disorder: Causes, Symptoms, Types and Treatments
GTA 4 control settings
FAQ on Smuggling in GTA Online
LSPDFR - welcome to the police
The huge map of Grand Theft Auto San Andreas and its secrets