It happens that when we start interacting with another person, we understand: we didn’t even have time to open our mouth, and the interlocutor already disliked us. This happens if the attitude of the counterpart to us is biased. What does prejudice mean, and is it possible to change the situation in your favor? Albert Einstein said: "In this sad world, it is easier to split an atom than to overcome prejudice." However, you can try. This is what will be discussed in the article.

What is prejudiced relationship

Biased attitude means that a person made some conclusions about our personality even before we had time to express ourselves.

Such an attitude can be based on a variety of stereotypes or prejudices - for example, about nationality, gender, age, external data, profession, religion, education, social status, political views, behavior ....

This attitude can be explained by the usual psychological incompatibility or personal hostility, as well as negative experiences in the past or the obsessive opinions of others. Sometimes even a primitive incompatibility of tastes can lead to the fact that people treat each other negatively and stereotypically.

Some examples of showing bias:

• A middle-aged man listens to a young interlocutor half-heartedly, because he is convinced in advance that he cannot say anything smart - he is too young. Although in reality it turns out that the “green” in terms of wisdom and intelligence is quite capable of giving odds to the “gray-haired”.
• A woman will not be able to lead a male team - she will not have enough strong-willed qualities and fortitude, she is not able to gain authority. Although it may well be that the lady successfully coped with a similar task in the past.
• The surrounding people think beautiful girl not distinguished by outstanding mental abilities. It doesn't matter if she runs a research institute.
• People see a banker and think he is greedy; journalist - and shut up, believing that it is impossible to tell him anything, etc.
• The employer does not want to take a woman on staff after the decree, because she is sure that she does not remember anything except milk porridge recipes. But in fact, she could work every day of her parental leave, thanks to which she not only did not lose, but also improved her professional qualities.
• The jury member judges the contestant not by his achievements, but based on his personal opinion about the person himself.

Why is it important

To be biased means to deprive a person of a chance completely undeservedly. For example, the chance to get Good work, make a warm friendship with him or even love relationship and create a wonderful family ... Being biased, a person becomes an unfair, limited, uninteresting interlocutor. It is not easy to believe, but it is precisely a prejudiced attitude that is the first step to such terrible phenomena like intolerance, fanaticism, wars, genocides…

Few of us are able to please everyone - after all, we are not hundred-dollar bills, we have our own characteristics, and are not compatible with everyone.

But if relationships with a person are important to us - for example, they are beneficial to us or simply desirable, you can still try to achieve objectivity. In several ways.

Find out the relationship

This is the easiest and boldest way to express your true self. If we see that a person has made some conclusions about us even before we had time to say even a word, we can directly ask what is wrong, offer to ask direct questions about his personality, and if the interlocutor has met halfway, as sincerely as possible. answer them.

• For example, a young man in a dirty T-shirt and the same shorts sees a girl on the embankment and wants to invite her for coffee. She, noticing the appearance of the guy, only wrinkles her nose and turns away. If the girl liked you too much, it might make sense to ask directly if the clothes repel her from the flirter, and explain her unsightly appearance - for example, a friend asked for help with the move. And then already invite to meet in the evening, promising to dress decently.
• Or, say, a university graduate comes for an interview, and sees that the employer, having learned about the lack of experience, has already given up on him as a candidate. It makes sense to directly ask if this worries the representative of the company, and tell them - even though there is no work experience, but there are excellent grades in the diploma, experience in internships, participation in social projects, interesting topic thesis, energy, enthusiasm and the ability to learn at the speed of light.

Prove by deed

This is the most the right way dispel doubts about yourself - with the help of concrete results.

If we are given such a chance, we can convey the truth to others not in verbal form, but with real deeds.

Deeds towards people and achievements in the professional environment are much more revealing than inspired stories about yourself and your legendary qualities.

For example, if the boss believes that the employee is a real lazy and incompetent, but the results of the annual performance assessment indicate that this is not at all the case, and he does not have the worst result in the department. Only a tyrant will argue with the conclusions - alas, there are many of them, but often objective indicators are still able to convince.

The third is not superfluous

Sometimes, in order to cope with the bias of a person whose opinion is important to us, we need to call on others for help. For example, if the boss gave a low rating to our work, you can ask two or three more experts to provide their independent opinions, and based on them, turn to the boss with a request to reconsider his own.

Of course, this does not apply to everyone - there are people who will only be angry with such antics. But there are those who are wise enough to admit their mistake, if it really took place.

Call for diversity

Not without reason in developed communities, including in efficient companies, the so-called. the concept of flexibility and diversity. According to it, it is believed that the more in a team or group of people who differ in various parameters (gender, nationality, age, views, temperament, experience, skills), the better. Because these people are able to look at the problem from a variety of angles, offer different solutions and find the best among them.

You can appeal to this argument, trying to convey to a person - for example, a boss, the thought: the fact that you are not similar does not mean that one of you is bad. This, on the contrary, plays into the hands of all participants in the process.

listen

They say there is no smoke without fire. According to this logic, if a person thinks badly of us, then there is definitely a rational grain in his opinion. Experience suggests that this is not always the case.

However, it still makes sense to pay attention. Is there really something in our behavior that makes people think the wrong way about us?

wave your hand

Alas, this tactic is often the only possible one. If you want to change the situation, but the person does not make contact and stubbornly refuses to be objective, you just have to stop paying attention and live with it in parallel. Since the transplant own thoughts no one can do it.

In addition, it is always useful to remember: there are people who like to gossip, slander, humiliate. But this is their own business.

Frequently Asked Questions

I'm biased towards people, what should I do?

It is necessary to understand the reasons for this perception. Most often, this is done by those who are used to thinking in a stereotyped way or classifying people. For example, when your friend earns a huge amount of money and lives with his wife much younger, you impose a template on the situation in advance. If you previously knew the person in prison who offended you, now you will see a threat in each of them. Fear, expectation of the worst will lead to the fact that there will be fear and prejudice towards those who were sitting. Often the opinion is wrong. Don't project your expectations onto the actions of others. You should analyze what kind of person is in front of you, what his past experience is and how he lives now. This will make it easier to perceive reality. It's best not to set expectations. Let the situation and relationships with people be built as they should, without stereotypical thinking and prejudices. Lower your requests. Seek the best aspects of the people around you and don't label them.

Unbiased attitude, how is it?

An unbiased attitude is built on trust in others. You do not expect anything in advance. You allow a person to open up, show their dignity. Of course, there are certain patterns of thinking, reactions, behavior, but sometimes people are able to surprise. Evaluate people, use your experience, but do not allow yourself to label a person in advance. An unbiased attitude is the acceptance of a person. You don't blame him in advance.

Prejudice, how is it?

Prejudice is an accusation or justification of other people, their actions, deeds, reactions, social status. You can either overestimate something, or, conversely, underestimate in advance. As a rule, the assessment comes from previous experience. For example, you think that everyone who takes the subway to work is a low-income person. Thus, you do not even admit that the metro eliminates traffic jams, saves time on the road, or may be your favorite mode of transport. A preconceived notion is built on a piece of information about something or someone. Because the information is incomplete, prejudice often leads to errors, conflicts, and frustrations.

What is the meaning of the word "prejudice"?

Bias is a biased assessment of someone or something. It is based on prejudice, prejudice, previous experience, information obtained from unreliable sources, or addiction. It can overestimate and perceive something, or underestimate it.

Prejudice, what is it?

This is a view of things, formed in advance. A preconceived notion can appear before meeting someone, visiting a place or institution, reading a book, watching a movie, or getting a job. You have not yet allowed the person to open up, but have already formed an opinion about him. It can be both positive and negative. A preconceived notion is a judgment.

Prejudice at work, what to do?

If you are suffering from prejudice at work, you have the power to change that. A frank conversation with those who have previously formed an opinion about you, time, a closer acquaintance can change the situation. For example, you can organize a party. Or invite those who have not yet had time to get to know you better. Rapprochement, conversations, dialogue will help. If there was an incorrect assessment of you as an employee, prove the opposite. Take on the task and complete it, show that you are a specialist and a professional in your field. If you have a prejudiced opinion about a colleague or boss, try changing the assessment. Try to see the merit. Accept another person, evaluate him realistically, without starting from the information received about him earlier.

What is a "non-judgmental person"?

An unbiased person is characterized by what he does not appreciate. He accepts the world the way he is. Such a person looks at the facts without starting from experience, information, prejudices, racial or other prejudices. His assessment is correct. He does not expect from a person certain reactions, behaviors or attitudes. Getting into a strange environment for himself, an unbiased person equally sees the positive and negative sides and only then makes his assessment. Poor service in one of the restaurant chains does not mean that in the same restaurant, only in Kiev, the situation will repeat itself. The ability to easily relate to life improves the emotional state of a person. An open-minded person is much less likely to be disappointed. He doesn't expect anything ahead of time.

What is a synonym for the phrase "prejudice"?

A synonym for prejudice are: prejudice, prejudice, assessment, judgment, sentence, expectation of something, subjective attitude or assessment, partiality, one-sidedness, limitation, biased perception.

What is the antonym for the word "prejudiced"?

Antonyms of the word "prejudiced" are: objectively, versatile, acceptance of something or someone, impartially, unbiasedly, fairly, in accordance with merit, without evaluation.

Prejudiced attitude of the boss, what to do?

Often, even before the first working day, the boss has already formed an opinion about you. It arose from someone's warnings, from an analysis of your resume, level of education, work experience, and even appearance. The attitude of the boss can be both positive and vice versa. In both cases, it can harm your career. In the first working weeks, show yourself with better side. The preconceived attitude of the boss will change. Which way is up to you. If it was based on the perception of your appearance, consider whether it is worth changing. For example, you are a tall, slender, dyed blonde. Do you like the way you look, but the boss or boss does not perceive blondes positively, only brunettes? Then think about whether it is worth adjusting to their taste. If your assessment is lower than you deserve, it was formed because of your style or makeup (too catchy appearance, revealing outfits, blue stockings) - analyze how your colleagues go to work. Assess yourself from the outside. Change your style and your bow. So the opinion of you will change literally immediately. Divide the bias into assessing you as a professional, as a person, and assessing your appearance. In work, the main thing is professionalism. Assessment of personality traits (character, temperament, etc.) is important in building relationships with loved ones, friends, relatives. Yes, and appearance is purely your business, if it is not neglected or, conversely, not too vulgar.

Positive bias, how is it?

The positive bias is built on a high pre-assessment. Even before meeting, visiting a place, buying something, a positive opinion has already been formed. The problem is that disappointment from wrong expectations can be painful. It will affect the assessment in the future. For example, based on good advice comrades, the boss is preparing to hire an excellent specialist. Although, it turns out that he is undisciplined, was educated “for money” and humiliates his subordinates. In order not to make mistakes, one should perceive someone or something without evaluation. Let yourself be shown. Look objectively at the situation.

Prejudice against women, what to do?

If a prejudiced attitude towards women is observed in a man, you should analyze where it came from. This may be a failed marriage, a bad relationship with a mother or sister, being raised by a father who was disappointed in women or perceived them only as a sexual object. Cheating ex-lovers, lies, quarrels, negative past also influence. Only the man himself can change the attitude. He must learn to perceive women not as a whole, but as individuals, with their own character, experience, appearance, the right to decide and change. High or low expectations should be left in the past. Treat a woman like a person. Evaluate what she is like as a hostess, interlocutor, friend. Sometimes a fat woman is not from a good appetite, but from hormone therapy, and the redhead is not necessarily liberated. Try to understand her. Accept it the way it is.

Biased protection, what is it?

Biased defense does not necessarily apply to lawyers. Often this is the attitude of a mother to a child, a boss to a nice colleague, a wife to her husband. For example, a mother, knowing about the cruelty of her son, will justify him, even if he ends up in a pre-trial detention center. She will find an excuse for his behavior, despite the facts. Or a wife defends a husband who beats her, seeing signs of love in his behavior. This is because everyone believes what they want. Biased defense is formed on subjective perception. A person thinks that his assessment is correct. He pushes away from her, ignoring reality. Such protection harms not only the prejudiced person, but also what or whom he protects.

Conclusion

Conclusion

Prejudice is a very real problem that can lead to negative consequences, both in the life of the bearer of a biased opinion and its object. This attitude, if it has any meaning, you can try to change. This is not always possible, but the attempt, as they say, is not torture.