What to do when you don't know what to do? How to make the right decision? I don't know what I want from life.

Are you completely confused?

There is darkness in the head, fog around, thoughts are more difficult to catch than a perch with your bare hands?

And this state, unfortunately, is not a consequence of pleasant and have fun. Or rather his long absence?

And you don't like where you are right now? No, I'm not talking about walls (although they can annoy you). I'm about life situation. You didn’t dream about it at all and aspired not here?

Then you have come to the right place. Your time has come make decisions and change lives. How?

Enough questions, let's move on to the answers.

What to do when you don't know what to do?

Step one - calm down

Put your hands down, stop tantrums, stop tearing your hair out and swooning from uncertainty. Allow yourself to relax: take a bath, drink a cup of coffee (tea, compote). Cognac is better not to get involved. If possible, be sure to sleep well.

Step two - forward to nature

How often people in cities, especially large ones, close themselves in their birdhouses. And if you are reading these lines,then you probably periodically dive into social media , personal diaries, network games and othersdelights of the internet, from which it is not so easy to escape even for a person with a stable psyche.

So, forward to nature! Preferably for a week. But if circumstances do not allow - for the whole day. If it’s really bad - for 2-3 hours in the park with a dog, with a bicycle, roller skates, c children or simply, alone with yourself, contemplating the harmony of nature and enjoying the beauty of the current season.

After that, it will begin to dissipate, the anxiety will melt. And useful thoughts descend from Olympus. If this did not happen, then

Step three - release

Take a piece of paper and write down everything you don't like about your life. Describe in detail the situation in which you have driven yourself, or someone has driven you. Describe "someone" well too, just in case (he won't know about it). Don't spare paper.

And now, attention is an important point:

Make up your mind that you really don't like it. Then you can, without much regret, part once and for all with unloved job, with emotions of fear, pity, anger.

and to yourself first and foremost. will set you free and give you extra energy.

If something is a pity, you will have to live as you lived until you press it again. 😉

Step four - break the connection

Second important point:

Analyze what led you to this situation, and what conclusions you can draw from this. What did life want to tell you when it planted such a pig? If you do not do this, then very quickly you will again be left with nothing. Then write down all the conclusions on a separate sheet, and preferably in a notebook.

Step Five - Brainstorm

Imagine that a neighbor came to you and told about his troubles (troubles, oddly enough, are exactly yours).

give him 101 advice on getting out of this situation. Write whatever comes to mind: janitor, before bowing to the President of America. The wider, farther, deeper, higher, and freer you think, the more realistic and viable options will begin to emerge.

Have you written? Can have a smokedrink tea. It's good to make another outing into nature.

Ecology of life. Psychology: Sometimes events occur, in the process or as a result of which we find ourselves in a situation where we don’t know ...

When everything goes the way we are used to, in most cases we know without any problems what to do, how and when to do it.

But this is not always the case, sometimes events occur, in the process or as a result of which we find ourselves in a situation where we don’t know what to do, but we need to do something.

So what do you do when you don't know what to do?

Today I will give an answer to this question, the answer is actually simple. Efficiency in general is very often associated with simplicity and obviousness, which are lost in the haste and panic of the unforeseen. And most importantly - help yourself - available to everyone.

So, the first and main rule, it must be clearly understood and followed:when you don't know what to do - first of all do what you know(at a comfortable pace, rhythm, not forgetting to rest). Difficult, new or unfamiliar actions, as well as following impulses in important or difficult situations (issues) - most often lead to mistakes and deterioration of the state of affairs + doing what you know helps with regaining feelings of control and security that usually disappear in a difficult situations.

Second rule: learn to plan. Highlight the goal, break the goal into tasks (preferably in writing). The plan in its general form should be as simple and understandable as possible, the more complex (global) the plan, the higher the probability of errors, since there are too many uncontrolled variables, as well as the possibility of forgetting or missing something.

Third rule: wait for the result of the actions according to the plan. Even if the plan is of high quality and fully implemented, it takes time for the result to appear, difficult situations, as a rule, are not immediately and radically resolved. Therefore, after each step (action) according to the plan - make a stop (pause) to see and realize the result.

Rule four:take better care of yourself.Oddly enough, but - we, most often, are our own worst critics and worst enemies. We can give chances and opportunities to other people, often for no reason, but we do not want to give ourselves the slightest indulgence, nor the right to make a mistake (weakness, procrastination).

But we are - our main resource for solving situations, so you need to take care of yourself, give yourself chances - always!

Rule five: ask for help and accept help. Doing everything yourself, no matter what, defiantly not asking for or accepting help - very often this is what prevents you from coping with the situation faster and more efficiently. But in most cases there are people nearby who are ready to help, you just need to ask (after all, they don’t read minds) and not refuse when help is offered. If in doubt, see rule four.

Following such at first glance unpretentious rules will at least not hurt, but as a maximum it can really help and greatly facilitate the way out of an unforeseen difficult situation. published . If you have any questions on this topic, ask them to specialists and readers of our project .

Here is such an original and concise question I received in the mail from the reader Igor. The question, of course, is not specific, but judging by the analytics on the Internet, it is very relevant. And if the question exists, then the answer must be.

Behind the question "What to do?" there can be a different scale meaning - from elementary momentary idleness, to the search for the meaning of life. Let's take a look at some of the most common ways people ask this question, the main recommendations, and the key laws of decision making.

What should I do? Options, by situation

If you find yourself in a difficult, unpleasant, conflict or, as you think, hopeless situation.

1. You need to calm down and pay off any negative emotions: , etc. Remember - “Never make responsible decisions in a negative or depressed psycho-emotional state”, in this case, any of your decisions will be wrong and destructive for you and your destiny. First, you need to remove the negative, emotions, regain positive or at least calmness, and only after that think, analyze and make decisions. Read more:

2. Next paper and pen will help you. When you have more or less calmed down and pulled yourself together, take a pen and write. write it all out possible options solutions to the situation, which can only come to your mind, for this, let go of yourself, your mind, give yourself free rein and write out briefly even the most incredible and fantastic options. Write the longest possible list - 10-20-30 points.

Then several times, slowly re-read all the options you wrote, if something else comes to your mind, add it to the list.

After that, cross out one option at a time. First of all, cross out those decisions that will lead to the most negative consequences, if implemented (the most negative, radical). Think with your head, and not with your fifth point (resentment, fear, desire for revenge, etc.), for this, clearly imagine all the consequences of this decision, so as not to become an enemy to yourself.

What to sacrifice? When in the decision-making process such a question (dilemma) arises in front of you - always sacrifice your weakness and negativity (resentment, etc.), and not your fate, relationships, prospects or the fate of your loved ones, even if you are offended by them . Remember, if you follow your weakness, resentment, rage, cowardice, or pride, you will never win or win, but only lose. And if you can find the strength in yourself to step over your own pride and pride, overcome resentment and conquer fear in yourself, you will become stronger in spirit and take a powerful step up to the next step of your destiny. This is something that you should fight for and something that you can respect yourself for later.

3. If you are consulting with someone, be sure to consider the following:

The motives of the person you are consulting should be positive. You must be sure that he wishes you well (be extremely sincere in this, do not be deceived).

The person who advises must understand something in the relevant issue. You should not consult a botanist in matters of nuclear physics. How not to about It is to consult with the poor or peasant about business, career and finances.

And even if you decide to consult with someone, always make the decision yourself and be 100% responsible for it. You must fully feel and be sure that this is your decision, and not someone else (imposed).

If you have reached a dead end in life, do not know how and why you should live on?

Often the question “what to do?” much more than a person would like to think about it. Therefore, if you feel that your life is collapsing, if you have lost yourself and do not want to live, then these issues need to be addressed.

When you ask yourself the question “what to do?”, you need to continue it, try to rephrase: what to do with what and with whom? with your life, with yourself or with something specific? where to go? in which direction to look, strive?, etc.

Rephrase and expand the question and it will be easier for you to answer it!

If the question is “what should I do?” is of a global nature for you, I recommend the following practical articles for reading and elaboration:

Don't be afraid to ask big questions, don't be afraid to think about the meaning of life! Remember, if there are questions, then there are answers, and these answers will make you many times stronger and happier if you find them.

1. Write down on paper all the possible options and choose the best one.

2. Rephrase the question, rephrase it, expand it, or better yet, break the question into several smaller questions and answer them (it will be much easier to find the best solution).

3. Consult only with adequate and knowledgeable person, with a good friend.

4. If you are a believer, you are in luck! Ask God, the Light Forces to direct you, to let you know where and why to go with some signs and situations according to fate so that you understand this. Believe me Higher power know how to help a person accept correct solution, they have many more tools for this than humans.

• Read more -

5. What else helps? Watch a good movie. A good film sets one on a certain wave, gives energy, inspiration, raises the spirit and confidence of a person, and in a new state, new, stronger decisions often come. Listen to good inspiring music. Music emotionally relaxes a person and connects him to the streams of creativity that bring new thoughts, ideas and forces into the human mind.

There will be more specific questions -!

I don't know what I want, but I have the right to know how to become a happy person! This is not a "fat rage" and not a neurotic problem, as they say in smart books. What if I don't know what I want? How to find out your desires? These and other questions will be covered in this article ...

“I want some FAQ, but I don’t know FAQ! ..
The floors are not swept!.. Shake the doormat, shall we?”

- What's wrong with him?

- And this is our Kuzenka with fat rages.
It happens to everyone when there are no problems.

- We need to look at the people
they are full of problems and help someone.

What to do for those who do not know how to fill themselves, and turned into the wrong path? Who does not know how to become that person living in joy and happiness? How to find out your desires? These and other questions will be covered in this article.

Mistakes when searching for my desires, or I don't know what I want in life

Searching for answers to pressing questions, what to do with your life and how to find something you love, sometimes takes half a lifetime. Often this path to yourself is strewn with a series of obstacles and mistakes. And it happens that these moments plunge a person into an unpleasant state: one wants to be sad, then whine and complain, and sometimes it is senseless to diagnose everything.

How does it happen?

She wants to become a music teacher, and her father dissuades her, arguing that it is not prestigious, unprofitable.

- On what to live? Who needs your intelligence? And how to live on those pennies that a representative of the intelligentsia receives? Girl, be practical! The world is material! You can’t earn money for an apartment in Moscow, and you can’t earn money for the “goodies” that a prosperous life gives, either. So get that nonsense out of your head! Do you want my business partners to think that I am a rogue and cannot educate my daughter in a prestigious place? It's decided. Enter the Faculty of Business and Management.

“Well, why is that? Why isn't he interested?" she sighs softly. However, being an exemplary and obedient daughter, she, swallowing her tears, cancels herself for the umpteenth time, following the desires of others. But how else, if you are not heard by such important people in your life?

As Yuri Burlan's system-vector psychology describes, people with the anal-visual ligament tend to make such mistakes in the process of searching for their destiny. People with very diligent, assiduous, obedient, medalists and class leaders. And it gives a person the highest emotional amplitude. These are people who have sparkle, love, joy, warmth in their eyes. These are drawn to people. They create emotional ties with them: with a grandmother, a child, a man. These are people-magnets, to which everyone is drawn.

The combination of both vectors gives us the golden child in total! Obedient from childhood, strives to do everything impeccably. The little owner of the anal vector really needs the praise of his parents. “I did everything very well, and my mother praised me” It's fun for a child. Sometimes these qualities are the object of manipulation for parents. "Do this or I won't love you", “If you don’t do this, you are a bad girl, you will upset your mother.”

Such manipulation can form a complex of a good girl (boy) in a child, which will affect his whole life. Instead of realizing his natural talents, such a person will do everything to “not upset”, “not offend”, in order to remain “loved and good”.

Consider another example

"Take a risk!" wives shout to their husbands

The wife drives her husband to the success training "How to make a million", and he goes. He sits, writes word for word evenly, line by line, Robert Kiyosaki's money quadrant. Tries to study well, as always.

He promised his wife this month on new job get settled. But just recently he was a furniture maker - a master of golden hands. His wife insisted on his leaving. “Stop hunchbacking for a penny! she said. - You have such potential! Tomorrow you go to training. I've even bought a seat for you. Go listen. That's where the real money can be made."

The man sighs. He is unhappy: I myself do not know what I want, but my wife knows. But does the wife know the desire of her husband, or does she push him to where she herself likes?

What to do if you don't know what you want from life

Considering systematically both of the above examples from the life of a person with an anal vector, one can find out that a person does not know himself. And our parents, relatives, people around us look at the world through themselves. They evaluate it according to their value system. So that you don’t have to complain later, accumulate resentment, get stuck in the past or follow other people’s desires, you need to get to know yourself true.

Ask yourself what makes me happy? Because I have a right to know. What do I want in life? What business should you dedicate yourself to? You can find answers to these and other questions, you just need to risk looking into the depths. To know your mental that lives as a person, and find an inner answer. It is very useful to play sometimes why - this is not a question for a psychologist, it is orders of magnitude more productive. Understanding mental properties - what talents are given to a person, what he is predisposed to - makes his life better, more interesting, fuller. A person gets the ability to realize himself as much as possible. A person becomes more confident in making decisions, and no one is able to lead him away from the right path that suits him.

So in the case of a wife who, through the prism of her properties, drove her husband into business, but he cannot enjoy it. The properties are different. People with an anal vector are not businessmen. What makes them happy is the best masters, teachers, husbands with golden hands, the most faithful and devoted. Or a girl who dreamed of becoming a music teacher - being engaged in a family business, she is unlikely to experience pleasure. After all, her talents will remain unrealized.

Understanding your properties allows you to find a business that makes a person happy.

What to do to start wanting something

And it happens. He is such a mysterious silent man ... a look fixed on infinity. Such depth! He is concerned with: "What is the sense of life? What is behind all this? Where does everything come from and where does it go? Who is in control of all this? After all, there must be an answer! Otherwise, what is all this for?

“Sometimes it seems that I don’t know what I want from life, because I have tried everything that is in this world and I’m not interested. Yachts, villas, family, love, sex. These are all stupid desires. I don't know what I want..." In my head, someone beats out a false melody with a hammer, and it seems there is no escape. Hell in which the body is forced to be. The body that holds him in a vice on this Earth and still holds him ... For a while, a dream helps to forget.

For days on end, he can lie facing the wall, so that no one touches him, does not talk to him ... They just left him alone with himself, where no one prevents him from immersing himself in himself and his thoughts. Finally something to think about!

It is unbearable to live and not find an answer to the question - what am I living for? What is the sense of life? Is there even the slightest sense in my forced stay here?

The carriers say - I don't know what I want, I don't want anything - because their desires are beyond material values. They are aimed at understanding the metaphysical world, which cannot be felt and touched. But you can know, reveal. After all, sound engineers, without realizing it, want to expand their consciousness, where there are no time and space limits. They want to know the governing force, the creator, God. What laws of nature govern everyone. Even the question - what exactly do I want? - they have a completely different order, the abstract intellect is eager to get what is hidden in the unconscious. In order to satisfy the mental hunger, the sound engineer goes from one "teaching" to another, trying to reveal the meaning of life.

It is a person with a sound vector who can find answers in the process of cognition. But the answers lie not within himself, but in all people connected by invisible threads of the common eight-dimensional matrix of the psychic.

How to change your life

According to system-vector psychology, each person is a whole palette of desires. Our thoughts serve our very “I WANT”, which come from the unconscious. It lives with us and rules the ball.

The task of each of us- realize your innate desires. The more we are able to understand ourselves, our desires and take the right actions to fulfill them, the brighter and more joyful our life is. After the training, System-Vector Psychology is reported by thousands of people.

We invite you on a date with yourself. Get to know your own Self and find out, filling every day with meaning. "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan.

Proofreader: Natalia Konovalova

The article was written based on the materials of the training " System-Vector Psychology»

If you are wondering: "What to do if you don't know what to do?", it means that you either don’t know what to do, that is, you haven’t decided what business you want to do in life, or you know what business you want to do, but don’t know where to start.

If you belong to the first category, then welcome to the sections: and. After completing all the tasks in these sections, you will know exactly what you need to do in life. And you will find the business of your dreams. If the information in these sections is not enough for you, then you can familiarize yourself with the course.

If you belong to the second category, that is, you know what you want to do, but do not know where to start, then this article is written especially for you. I wrote some tricks in the article -. But I think nothing terrible will happen if I repeat myself a little in this article.

To be honest, I often ask myself: "What do you do when you don't know what to do?". Sometimes it happens that you seem to know what you want, but there is NO way or plan to achieve the goal, and if there is a way or plan to achieve the goal, then immediately there is NO OPPORTUNITY. For example, to achieve the goal there is not enough money, or you need to go to another city or country, or you don’t have enough knowledge, either ..., or .... I think you understand perfectly well what I'm talking about, because we all face such an absurd situation.

So what do you do when you don't know what to do? Breaking your head is not effective method, dripping on the Internet - already closer, regularly asking questions - exactly what you need. Yes that's right.

The second answer to the question of what to do if you don’t know what to do is to look for information in various sources: the Internet, seminars. Sometimes the answer is in some or article. But again, look for answers without fanaticism. The simplest and at the same time hard way to find the answer to your question is to ask a person who knows what needs to be done to come to such a result. In other words, you need to use someone else's experience.

If you want to open a cafe, but do not know where to start, then you can ask your friend who is engaged in this business. Sounds simple. And if there are no acquaintances who are engaged in this business, then what? To find? YES!!! Now you understand why this method is complex and simple at the same time.

In my life, I noticed that people are happy to share information, their experience about something specific. People love to tell their success story. But it also happens that people do not want to share information even for money. Nobody needs competitors. So try to find a person who has already achieved what you want to achieve. Let him be your mentor.

What to do if you don't know what to do?

Another category of people who wonder what to do if you don't know what to do- just found themselves in a dead end or hopeless situation in their opinion. For example, you were fired from a highly paid job when you have small children and outstanding loan. Of course, the answer suggests itself. In such a situation, the first thing to do is to calm down. I know it's very difficult, but under the influence of emotions, the problem only gets worse. If I found myself in such a situation, then I would start looking for a new job and ask for help from relatives and friends.

Never be afraid to ask for help if you find yourself in a desperate situation. I perfectly understand that you do not want to look pathetic in the eyes of other people, and pride does not allow you to make a call to your friend and, for example, ask him to lend you a certain amount. But if you do not ask for help, then you will continue to wonder - what to do when you don't know what to do?

Sometimes situations like this just need to be dealt with. For example, you were dumped by a guy with whom you lived for quite a long time. Most likely, you consider him the only person, and you cannot imagine your life without him. It never crosses your mind that you can meet another guy with whom you will be much happier. Instead, you think . Just at such moments, the girl does not know what to do and how to behave so that the guy returns. Time passes, attempts to return the guy were unsuccessful, and the girl slowly begins to forget him. As the saying goes, out of sight, out of mind. And after a while she meets the guy of her dreams.

That is, it turns out that at the time of parting, she had no idea what to do. She thought that she was in a dead end, and after a while she is already making plans for the future with her new boyfriend. That is, sometimes it is better to let go of the situation, and then it will resolve itself.

The same example can be given in relation to business. When a business collapses, entrepreneurs, no matter how hard they try, cannot save it. They don't know what they need to do to save their business. And so, sleepless nights they think about how to fix the current situation, but they can’t find an answer. As a result, the business collapses completely, and entrepreneurs, in their opinion, find themselves in a dead end. Having let go of the situation, after a while, the ruined entrepreneurs find new, better ideas.

In short, if you don't know what to do, just shut up and do something useful. For example, read a book. The authors of this book answer in more detail the question of what to do if you do not know what to do.