Don't waste time. How not to waste time? Basic principles of time management

How to stop complaining about life and get rid of whining?

After all, if this happens in your life, then it seems to you that it does not have something very important and necessary for you. But is it?

They say that rich is not the one who has a lot, but the one who has enough.

And here we are faced with the fact that we ourselves do not know very often, “What is enough for us?” and because of the feeling of internal deficiency, we continue to complain about life.

Let's take a look at this issue today. I suggest looking at the reasons first.

Why do people start whining and complaining?

Great need for love and attention

Such people feel an acute lack of attention, ask a lot of questions and they need even more clarifications. They talk a lot about themselves, about their experiences, about the events that happen to them. And of course, they complain, complain, complain ....

And they are all bad or not good enough. And it is imperative that everyone around look at this person and say in unison: you are the best, the most wonderful, etc.

It's not about a sense of self-importance. This is about the fact that when I have so little love inside and it is so empty and painful there that it is possible to somehow drown out this pain and fill it up only when I talk about myself and someone listens to me and gives me sympathy and love.

These people never get enough. And letting go of one "source of love and attention" they go to complain to another.

It is senseless and ungrateful to help solve the problems of these people. And to convince in something too.
After all, if there is nothing to complain about, then there will be no source of attention and support. And somehow you have to live with this emptiness

Is this hard to relate to? Try:

It's hard for you to be alone
- you can not let go of your children and loved ones in their independent life
- if someone did not report to you, did not ask about your well-being, etc. you feel left out and offended
- if someone starts to solve your problems, you always feel that he is doing it wrong or not good enough
- it is important for you to talk more than to listen to others
- the internal state of the eternal victim and a little useless person

It is difficult to give an unambiguous recipe for what to do with it. After all, we are all very individual.

But there are some things you can do for yourself. after reading this article .

Safety Factor Violation

From such people various scary stories about new strains of viruses, terrorist groups, climate warming and spoiled water and air.

Being close to such people is difficult, and after communicating with them, anxiety remains inside: what if it’s really dangerous to live?

Maybe it's about you? And if so, then you can object to me that you can’t live in rose-colored glasses and not notice everything that is happening around. You need to see and know the dangers and be prepared for them.

It is very difficult to restore the factor of internal security inside a person, especially if he has some kind of negative lived experience or, perhaps, it was the activation of the adopted feelings from the generic system.

And with this, of course, it is better to work with a specialist.

But you can try to do something on your own (below, an exercise will be given on how to stop complaining about life).

Heightened sense of injustice

“They stole, robbed, it’s good for her, he was just lucky, of course, she has such a dad / grandmother / husband / neighbor (underline the correct one)” - these motives underlie complaints and whining about life among such people.
Inside such a person there is a violation of the “take-give” balance and a strongly activated sense of justice, next to which there is aggression.

Moreover, these people do not know “what is right”, “how fair”, but they know that what is happening at the moment is not right.

They have a disturbed perception of the value of a contribution to events and an adequate assessment of reality.
For example:

“She looks good: she was born meter eighty, legs from the ears, breasts of the third size, and even a blonde. Lucky to get this from mom and dad! Therefore, her husband is rich. And I ... one and a half meters, who needs such a pigalis ... ”(there may be weight, height, eye color, hair, legs, size and shape of the chest, etc.: everyone has their own set of“ unfair ”places)

And here it is overlooked that in order to maintain such a shape, you need to spend 4-8 hours a week on physical exercise, keep a diet, manicure, pedicure, body, face, hair care. It's a lot of work and a lot of time!

And when you ask such a complainer: “Have you been making a face mask for a long time?” or “What do you eat after six?”, then in response you again hear complaints about how difficult and unfair life is.

Not the desire to do something, the depreciation of the contribution of the person who has it, but the demand for a “fair” attitude of life towards oneself. How can justice be done in this case?

And besides, a break from reality: not all blondes are happy and married, not all long-legged are satisfied with their companions, not all blue-eyed rich men. In fact, the opposite is often the case. But the fact of this is difficult and difficult to admit.

This is not a complete list of reasons why people complain about life. But for now, let's leave it at that. After all, the main thing is not to find out the reason, but to change ...

How to stop complaining about life?

To begin with, look at your life from a different angle and determine what is enough for you.

Set aside time for a small but very important exercise.

Part 1 Make a list of what is not in your life and you do NOT want it to be.

for example

I don't have earthquakes in my life
Have no rain showers
I don't have the plague
I have no problems with the tax
I don't have a drug problem
I don't have venereal disease
I am not homeless
I have no hunger (meaning that you have enough money for food)
Etc….

You need to write a list of 50 items. First, general moments will go, and then your real fears will appear, what you are really afraid of. And here the second column will help you.

for example
I have no injuries after accidents - I can not talk on the phone while driving, but buy a headset
I do not have diabetes - I can get tested to be sure and learn about prevention to avoid this and start doing it
Etc.
You will immediately see how you feel lighter and freer!
But! At least 50 points are important.
And already AFTER Once you write this list, you can move on to the next one.

Part 2 What I have and how can I get more joy out of it

Here it is very important (!!!) to fill in the second column at once.

I have health - I can listen to my body every morning, feel that everything is fine and thank him for it.

I have children - I can plan three hours every weekend for joint time (to go somewhere, do something).

I have a place to live - every time I cross the threshold, I can fixate a little on the fact that I am at home and enjoy it.

This list should be 100 items. It is necessary.

It is not necessary to do all the exercises in one day. But it is important to do the first part first, then the second. And to the extent indicated.

And you will see how your life will sparkle with new colors.

It will be wonderful if you start to purposefully implement something from the second column of the second list in life.

But even if you do not set such a goal for yourself, then all the same, you have already formed something in your mind. And one day you will be surprised to find that in the morning you stroke your body with a feeling of quiet joy, and when you cross the threshold of the apartment, you are filled with warmth and comfort and that you and your children have something to do together and they have become closer to you.

Once a month, if necessary, you can re-read these lists, supplement them.
And life will become easy and joyful.

And the question "How to stop whining and complaining about life" will disappear by itself.

After all, you will see that what is already in your life is already enough to live with joy!

Good luck with your practice!

PS In the format "Meetings in the Workshop of a Woman" there was a Film Training on the film "The Story of Us".

I want to share with you one of the interesting fragments.

I will be glad to see everyone at the next open meetings!

Time is life. Most people who waste their time don't even realize it. "Keep your time, for the days are evil." The words of the apostle Paul.

The days are wicked, life is short. After all, we are here. We are guests for a short, very long time a short time. And how terrible it is for a man who has squandered his time, wasted it on an abyss of trifles, on worthless and miserable things.

He turns around, and it turns out that life has already passed in petty worries, in empty, fruitless chatter, in some things that, perhaps, it was not even worth thinking about. Time passes.

We keep forgetting how little we have. And we spend, we spend on games, the Internet, social networks, YouTube and idleness.

What do we spend on a life

70% time we spend in front of digital media (TV, radio, smartphones, internet, game consoles, DVDs, multimedia devices).

14 years old- takes work

6 years we spend for food,

5 years- on the move

1 year- for reading

25 years old takes away sleep.

10 years - television takes our lives,

93% time we spend indoors =((

Women will spend 8 years of life on shopping trips,

Prayer is devoted to 2 weeks

And if we, believers, pray at least 5 minutes three times a day, then this is only three months or just Ten minutes a day is needed to read the Bible in one year...

That's why in old times

That's why in the old days it was a custom for people to keep scull human in the house, so that it reminds of death, and they even made such an inscription: “Memento mori!” - "Memento Mori!" Remember in order to live correctly, to live collectedly, to live in knowledge, in love, in work, understanding that this is given to us for a short time.

Time is given to us by God, appreciate it! Time does not return. The past is gone, the future is known to God alone, so use today wisely, for the benefit of the soul. "Now is the acceptable time, now is the day of Salvation," says the Bible. Tomorrow is not in our hands.

Time is our life. And if we kill, waste time, we kill our own life.

I know several Human

I know a few people who were terminally ill, and then the Lord gave them time. How they valued him, how they thanked God that they still had a year, two more, no one knows how long. Then they felt acutely - as it should be - time.

It's easier to go to the pub with friends than to spend the same time learning a language or a new skill. It is much easier to turn on the TV or waste time on mobile phones and on the Internet than to run several kilometers. Are these your values?

I suggest experiment

I suggest an experiment. For one week. Live it like it's the last week of your life.

Imagine that you only have seven days. Imagine well, turn on your imagination! Seven days. Try spending them looking at your watch.

Do something which was put off for a long time “for later”. Write a global to-do list for the week and get everything done. Forget about laziness, procrastination and the Internet - your life is now 168 hours! Ready? Then they flew!

Remember: the man who fights for every minute of his day is the freest and wisest of all.

Are you a member or spectator?

Think: if you make wise decisions now, it will have a beneficial effect on your future. If you start wasting time, your future will be full of regrets. And regrets are terrible, because it is impossible to return to the past and something change. That's why we should try to do the right thing, and not blame our circumstances, childhood, or the situation in the world for the fact that we live the way we live.

Or your goal - drink as many beers as possible with friends, repost as many jokes as possible and watch all the series and videos on YouTube? What do you want to get from that breathtakingly small piece of time that the Creator measured out for you? Where and what do you spend your time on?

It's time to stop just dreaming about life changing, and start taking action! We need to pray, make time for God, study God's Word, and faithfully do what He will lead us to do. Don't let fear stop you from moving forward.

If you are afraid of making the wrong choice, then take a step of faith with a strong-willed decision, step over fear and trust that God will warn you if you suddenly go in the wrong direction. It happens that you don’t understand which direction is right until you start moving.

Have you already made your plan for the day? Now look how important things you included in it. Depending on whether how much correctly you make your plan for the day - will depend on whether you are busy or productive.

In fact, these are two different concepts - being busy and being productive.

You can be always busy, constantly lacking time, coming home tired because you have been doing something all day.

The question is - WHAT DID YOU DO?

It's not what you do that matters. What matters is how effective your work is. Will you be productive and how does it meet your goals.

Time doesn't like being wasted.

To increase productivity, it is enough to include in your list those tasks that are completed.

For example, for those who work in the niche of copywriting, journalism creation of texts a more important matter than the periodic study of mail messages.

It is important to identify ways to "leak" time and limit this time.

For example, spend no more than 1 hour a day or not watch TV for more than 1 hour.

Important and unimportant things. What's the Difference?

Important things are more difficult, require more energy, but they are what bring us closer to the goal. Things that are not important are simpler, easier, but do not bring any benefit. You seem to have done a good job during the day, your to-do list is completed, but they haven't moved much.

Think is it worth spending time on such things?

Big to-do lists and unnecessary little things

Don't make up big to-do lists including all sorts of little things. Distinguish between the important and the unimportant. Note multitasking.

It has been proven that lists of the three most important things to do more efficient. Often we waste time on unnecessary things without noticing how much energy and strength they actually take away.

What are deadlines, strategic tasks and secondary

You always need to evaluate the work done in terms of value to your life. This is the kind of work worth spending time and effort on.

To work effectively means to secure your future self.

For example, mastering a skill. From my recent - learned how it works Evernote (smart assistant). Mega convenient application that helps to become more organized and productive.

Of the pros Evernote:

• creating notes
• copying information from the Internet
• sharing
• sync across devices.

Now I am gaining experience in Adobe Muse. In parallel, I deal with mind maps.

I pay attention in the morning English language. This is also a skill. You can just learn the language, or you can improve your level of English. I like the resource effective learning English.

A huge number of video lessons, films, songs, a powerful video dictionary, games for adults and children, etc. are provided here for free. After trying several options, I settled here.

You complete tasks, move up in the overall ranking of students, and this is a great motivator. Definitely my recommendation to use this resource. Link

Live in the present. It is important to focus on what you are doing at the moment.

If you are having breakfast, do not check your mail or hang out on social networks at this time. If you came to the gym, work out with dedication, feel every muscle.

The path to success is to be passionate about what you are doing and complete the tasks with maximum concentration. Then the efficiency will increase hundreds of times.

I decided to raise, perhaps, one of the most relevant topics: complaints about life. In this article I will tell you why this is bad, what it threatens, and, of course, how to stop whining and complaining. I would like all readers to honestly answer themselves whether they have such a “sin”, and draw conclusions. Hope this post helps someone.

So, complaints about life today can be found everywhere, and in recent years this has probably become a real scourge of our society. There are people who constantly complain about life and its individual aspects in personal conversations, in correspondence, on public pages. social networks, on forums, etc. When I open local citywide social media groups, I really see that 80% of all messages are different kind life complaints.

Someone was badly served in a store or in the market, someone was “cut off” by a dashing driver, someone was dissatisfied with the education and healthcare systems, someone was dissatisfied with prices, someone was hindered by stray dogs, etc. And people actively discuss it among themselves and publicly, complain to each other, sympathize. Naturally, this whole atmosphere of complaints exacerbates the existing problems even more, and creates a kind of negative background around people that has a detrimental effect not only on the complainers themselves, but also on their environment. And even not only to close people, but also to strangers who like to listen / read their complaints.

The category of complainers lately includes more and more people, according to my observations. There is another category - one that is greatly annoyed by complainers. And they, in turn, in the same way begin to complain about those who complain about something else. As a result, exactly the same negative background is created around them. How to deal with all this, how to fight, how to stop whining and complaining about life - let's try to figure it out.

Well, look. Life is really a complicated thing, I think no one will argue with that. And very often she presents some problems, difficulties, obstacles. Moreover, to all people without exception, well, except perhaps for someone - more, for someone - less. Although this situation may change in different time periods, and as a result, there are enough problems for everyone. But at the same time, we constantly hear complaints about life from some people, rarely from others, and never at all from others.

Why is this happening? The difference is only in psychological perception different people the same factors. To summarize, all people's reactions to problems and difficulties can be reduced to three options:

1. And why is this all for me! Fate is unfair to me! None so different! There is no end to these problems!
2. We need to look for a solution to the problem and solve it as quickly as possible!
3. Problem? Fine! There are so many positives in this!

People with Type 1 reactions, which unfortunately are the majority, of course, will always whine and complain. Someone might say: “Well, what's wrong with that? Well, it’s bad for a person, and he shares his problems, it becomes easier for him. And maybe even someone will help or tell you how to solve the problem!”. Well, firstly, asking for advice from those in the know is one thing, but complaining is another. And secondly, here's why whining and complaining about life is bad:

• A person who always complains is focused on the negative, creates a negative background around himself and drives himself into depression;
• He spends his precious and irreplaceable resource - time complaining and whining, that is, completely wasted, instead of doing something much more useful, for example, solving a problem that has arisen;
• A person gathers around him the same whiners and negative-minded people who will assent and sympathize with him, and, on the contrary, rejects cheerful and positive people who simply become not interested in him;
• There is an emotional degradation of a person (he ceases to experience positive emotions, but experiences only negative ones), which negatively affects absolutely all spheres of his life: from personal life before work.

That is, in principle, there is nothing good in complaining about life. If you see this - write in the comments, just curious.

Well, now I will offer you a number of methods to deal with this problem. So, how to stop whining and complaining about life?

1. Realize that problems are objectivity. These are just the realities of life that have always been, are and will be, it is simply impossible to run away and hide from them. Rather, if you do not have problems, this is something abnormal: perhaps you just do not see them yet. Everyone has problems, all the time. It's not only you, and it's an objective reality!
2. Be aware of your ability to control negative emotions. Whining and complaining about life is not part of your personality, these are emotions that you can control, which is what you should strive for.
3. Attract positive thoughts to yourself. Simply put, think positively more often. Even when you have a lot of problems. Surely there is someone or something that makes you positive emotions: children, loved one, some memories, some places, music, movies, books, etc. Think more often about such positive topics in order to displace negative thoughts from your thoughts.
4. Use the "bracelet method". There is one good rule, with which you can develop any good habit or get rid of a bad one -. It can be perfectly used to stop whining and complaining about life. And to control the performance, you can use any thing, for example, a bracelet. Put the bracelet on left hand and wear. As soon as you complain about something, change the bracelet to the right one, and so on. Your initial task is to carry the bracelet on one arm for at least 21 days.
5. Don't hang out with whiners. If your social circle is made up of people from whom you constantly hear complaints about life, this does not bode well: you will be the same as they are. It is necessary to change your social circle to people who are cheerful and positive-minded. As you communicate with them, your own worldview will also change.
6. Do not look for excuses and guilty. When a problem arises in your life, in no case should you look for excuses and blame someone else for it. This is a complete dead end, which will only further exacerbate your negative perception of this life difficulty.
7. Look for solutions. Instead, you need to immediately, as quickly as possible, analyze the problem and outline ways to solve it. This will be a much more effective direction of thought than whining and complaining about life. You might find this article helpful:
8. Take the positive out of the problem. Every situation has its pros and cons. In a problem, most people only notice negative sides, but there are often plenty of pluses too. At a minimum, this is gaining experience, which also costs a lot, but usually the advantages are not limited to this.

To make it clearer, I will give a few examples, I will take examples related to the financial sector.

Example 1 . You have been fired from your job. Positive: It's great to finally start looking for a new way to make money that will suit you more than this hateful job.

Example 2 . You are 70 rubles each, and now the rate has dropped to 60. This situation will perfectly help you learn to control your emotions, resist the temptation to sell them at a loss, and wait until the rate rises again to 70 or more.

Example 3 . You invested $1,000 in a certain financial company, and it turned out to be banal and disappeared without returning anything to you. First of all, it's great that you invested only 1000, and not all your capital. Secondly, for this money you bought yourself experience that will teach you to be more careful in choosing assets for investment.

I hope you are imbued with the idea that complaining about life is bad, and if you feel this way, you need to urgently think about how to get rid of it. I hope that my advice will help you with this.

Time is an irreplaceable resource, so it should be treated with care. If you constantly do not have time to complete important things, put off your plans, do not find time for yourself and loved ones, are in a hurry all the time and do not have time to go anywhere, you need to reconsider your attitude to time.

They say that the most valuable gift we can give another person is to give them our time. And this is understandable, because everyone has a limited supply of it. Time is said to be unstoppable, inexorable and irrevocable. But we don’t think about it, especially when we are young, and sometimes we simply kill the clock, wandering aimlessly around the apartment, hanging out in social networks, etc. - everyone has their own version.

As a result, it turns out that we lack some 5, 10 minutes to hand over the work on time, not to be late for the train or meeting. We promise ourselves that next time we will be organized and punctual, but again we step on the same rake.

The majority of people who do not know how to properly handle time. Otherwise, the term "" would not have appeared. Procrastinators are those who are currently doing everything they want, but not what they need. For example, sitting down to work, they remember that before they wanted to drink tea. Well, while drinking tea, you can read your mail or post a photo on Instagram. When they start cleaning, they stumble upon an interesting book that they haven’t finished reading, or photographs that lead to memories - “and let the whole world wait!”.

As a result, a "snowball" of cases that have become urgent accumulates, which threatens to literally knock them off their feet. Dissatisfied with those around them, whom they promised to do the job on time. They are dissatisfied with themselves, because they are chronically short of time. They promise themselves to be different tomorrow, but it’s not so easy to break out of the captivity of procrastination. Only people with self-discipline succeed in this, but such people do not fall into captivity.

It is worth noting that the phenomenon of procrastination is not new. Only the term itself is relatively new. It’s just that procrastinators used to be called not by this tricky term. They were talked about differently: they are squeamish, goofy, play the fool, pull rubber, etc. By the way, procrastination has a lot in common with laziness, but laziness is a narrower concept.

Why are we wasting time

We can only say that we have wasted time after it is gone. Before that, it seems to us that our occupation makes sense for itself. TV programs, conversations, gatherings, communication in social networks, aimless trips to supermarkets to “just try on” take a lot of time, although then we cannot remember what was discussed in the program or what we talked about with a friend. True, psychologists say that if not abused, such a pastime for some can be a kind of psychological relief - if only it does not become a way of life.

If we do not belong to those who are called inveterate lazy people, then main reason reason we shirk is a lack of interest in what we have to do, and a lack of motivation. American writer Jackson Brown advises: "Find a job that you like - that's how you add five days to every week!". He said the same Steve Jobs: "There is only one way to do great work - to love her."

The reason for procrastination can be the frightening amount of work ahead, and the insufficient level of knowledge to complete it on time, and the inability to plan your time. Knowing the reasons why our time is wasted, we can begin to "treat" the problem. Indeed, as the same Jackson Browne said, great people - Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Albert Einstein and others had no more time than we do, but they left behind a huge creative legacy.

Learning not to waste time

1. Master the science of time management - the science of time management

Time management principles can be used not only at work, but also at home. They will help you manage your time in such a way that there will be much more personal time intended for relaxation.

Reliable people waste personal time because they fulfill other people's requests, listen to empty conversations and, in fact, live someone else's life. They say, before you say “yes” to someone, think about whether you are saying “no” to yourself, your deeds and desires.

3. Put things in order

It takes a lot of time to find the right thing: we all know where to get it, but for some reason we forget to put it where we are looking for after we use it. In the course of the search, we are distracted by extraneous matters that have interested us, then we realize that, by the way, almost half a day has already passed. As a result, the search takes us more time than putting things in order.

The habit of being on time saves time, and the wastebasket is called an effective time management tool.

4. Set your mood

They say how you start your day is how you spend it. We got up in the morning with the thoughts that “everything is bad”, I don’t want to do anything, so I programmed myself for the whole day. And then we are surprised that the day was wasted! The mood requires tuning: so we don’t wind ourselves up, but think about the bonuses that await us ahead as a reward for a successful day. We say to ourselves: Have a nice day! - and for the cause.

5. Block social networks on a work computer

If we cannot resist the temptation and from time to time we look to see if something new has appeared there. We went for a minute, and at best, the hour was gone. You can sit all day, as there are plenty of sites for communication. You also need to throw a photo, which before that should have been corrected. So the day passed, as it turned out - in vain!

It is not so easy to get rid of such, if you already got into it, but you can. One has only to disconnect from social networks for a week to understand that their role in our life is not at all paramount.