When a long-awaited baby is born, the task of parents is to carefully introduce him into the world, protect him from misfortunes, put him on the righteous path. Orthodox parents share this enormous responsibility with their heavenly patron and godparents. After the rite of baptism, the life and fate of the child are entrusted to the aspirations of the Lord and the instructions of the godparents.
How to choose godparents
Baptism is a church sacrament, at the moment of which the further fate of the human soul is determined. At baptism, the child's godparents are determined. How to choose godparents for your beloved child, to whom to entrust such responsibility, can a husband and wife be godparents?
In fairness, it should be noted that there are some disagreements within the church on this issue. There is an opinion that in our time a married couple can become godparents, and this is being discussed. But these doubts are theoretical, and practically do not affect the daily life of the church. In the interests of the further well-being of godparents and godchildren, it is better to follow the approved order of things when choosing.
The role of godparents in the life of a godson
According to church rules, adult Orthodox parishioners can be christening recipients. After all, the godfather and mother should become spiritual mentors to the child for life. Can, for example, your friends husband and wife be worthy godparents for your child? After all, their role only begins after baptism: they must introduce the godson to the church, introduce him to Christian virtue, and teach the basics of religion. These should be responsible, sincerely believing people, because it is their prayers for the godson throughout his life that are paramount to the Lord. The choice of godparents for a child is a responsible step. The main thing is the ability of these people to answer for the godson before God, take care of his spiritual development and guide him on the righteous path. The Church believes that the godfather should take all the sins of the godchild, who has not reached the age of 16, onto himself.
Who should not be chosen as godparents
When choosing godparents, the child's family is puzzled by the problem, can a husband and wife be godparents? For example, a familiar married couple, close to the godson's family in spirit and in the church, is the best suited for the role of mentors. Their family is a model of harmony, their relationship is permeated with love and mutual understanding. But can this husband and wife be godparents?
Can a husband and wife have the same child as godparents? No, according to church laws, this is unacceptable. For the spiritual connection that arises between the recipients at baptism gives rise to a close spiritual union, which is higher than any other, including love and marriage. It is unacceptable that spouses could become godparents, this will jeopardize the further existence of their marriage.
If the husband and wife are in a civil marriage
The doubt whether a husband and wife in a civil marriage can be godparents, the church unequivocally decides in the negative. According to church rules, neither a husband and wife, nor a couple who are on the eve of marriage can become godparents. While preaching to Orthodox people the need for a church marriage, the church at the same time considers civil marriage, that is, registered in the registry office, legal. Therefore, the doubt whether a husband and wife who have approved their union by registering in the registry office can be godparents is resolved by a negative answer.
Engaged couples cannot become godparents, as they are on the eve of marriage, as well as couples living together outside of marriage, since these unions are considered sinful.
Who can become a godfather
Can a husband and wife be godparents to different children? Yes, this is a completely acceptable option. The husband, for example, will become the godfather of the son of close people, and the wife - the goddaughter. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, older sisters and brothers can also become godparents. The main thing is that it should be a worthy Orthodox Christian, ready to help the child grow up in the Orthodox faith. Choosing a godfather is a really responsible decision, because it is done for life. The godfather cannot be changed later. If the godfather stumbles on the path of life, deviates from the righteous direction, it is fitting for the godson to take care of him with prayers.
Rules for the rite of baptism
Before the ceremony, future godparents are trained in the church, get acquainted with the basic rules:
Before the sacrament of baptism, they observe a three-day fast, confess and take communion;
Be sure to put on a pectoral Orthodox cross;
Dress appropriately for the ceremony; women wear a skirt below the knees, be sure to cover their heads; do not use lipstick;
Godparents must know and understand the meaning of "Our Father" and "Symbol of Faith", as these prayers are pronounced during the ceremony.
Controversial cases
In exceptional cases, situations arise when parents have no other choice for godparents, except for a single married couple. Doubts whether a husband and wife can be godparents for a child are more than relevant in this case. It must be remembered that, according to church rules, it is quite enough to determine for a child only one godfather, but of the same sex, that is, we choose a godfather for a boy, and a godmother for a girl.
In each case, when parents have individual questions or doubts about whether it is possible for a husband and wife to be godparents, they should be discussed with the priest during preparation for baptism. Rarely, but still, there are cases when the question of whether a husband and wife can be godparents, with special permission and in view of exceptional circumstances, is resolved positively by the church.
Baptism is an important process in Russia. Even those couples who do not believe in God or believe, simply because they have to, baptize their children. From a religious point of view, baptism is the process of cleansing a newborn from original sin. The child is thus united with God. At the same time, parents think about who to make a spiritual mentor for the child. And the question is often raised as to whether a husband and wife can be godparents.
Why can't a husband and wife be godparents?
Our church has a negative attitude towards this situation and forbids a married couple to become foster parents for one child. At the same time, a couple can baptize different children from the same family.
Husband and wife cannot be godparents to the same child.
The Orthodox Church explains this prohibition by the fact that there is already a spiritual connection between husband and wife. During baptism, the bond between husband and wife may be weakened, as the bond that is formed with the child during this process is the strongest.
At the same time, it is possible that the priest will turn a blind eye to this if the couple has not been married or is not yet married. But doing so is undesirable. If you are a believer, then know that at the same time your connection with your husband at the wedding will be weak.
This is also explained by the fact that the husband and wife are already one, so neither of them can form one with the child.
Who can be godfather
Godparents can be:
- Relatives of children: grandparents, sisters, brothers and so on.
- People whose children you are the sponsor.
- Godparents of your first child. If you have already baptized the first child, then at the baptism of the second, you can ask the same people to become godparents for the second.
- Priest. If you do not have really close people to whom you could entrust this, then a priest can do it.
- There are superstitions according to which it is believed that a pregnant or unmarried woman without children will bring misfortune to the newborn. Do not believe, such girls can become godparents.
Treat the choice of a spiritual mentor for your son or daughter with responsibility, since it will be impossible to change your choice.
Baptism is an important process. Remember also that if the parents are divorced, then the stepfather cannot become a godparent. This is an important choice, so choose people who truly care about your son or daughter. Godparents should be mentors of children and help them develop spiritually. Therefore, take this with responsibility.
Christening is the second birth of a baby, but already before God. Parents carefully prepare for this important event, scrupulously approach the choice of godfather and mother. Often the right choice is given with great difficulty, because not everyone agrees to take on such responsibility. The Church says that anyone can baptize a child, but he must become a true parent from the holy spirit throughout his life. Whom to choose for such a responsible title, and can a woman and a man who are husband and wife become godparents?
Godparents husband and wife: the opinion of the Moscow Patriarch on the reasons for the ban
The main requirement of the Orthodox Church for those who baptize a child is that they must steadily believe, live a church life, know at least the most basic prayers (“Gospel”, “Our Father”, for example). This is urgently needed so that in the future they can fully fulfill the role of teachers for their godson. Parents in the church should give basic knowledge about the Orthodox faith, the spiritual principles of human existence. If the recipients are people ignorant of such matters, then there are great doubts about their original desire to become godparents.
The Church strictly monitors the fulfillment of each condition regarding the sacrament of baptism, and has a negative attitude towards cases when people consciously do not follow certain rules. There is an acute issue with the possibility of becoming godparents for a man and a woman who are married. On this score, the Orthodox religion has its own view, which is worth dwelling on in more detail.
According to Orthodox canons, a husband and wife cannot become the spiritual parents of one child. It is believed that they are already a single entity, being married. And if both will baptize the baby, it's wrong. This position is explained by the fact that during the sacrament of baptism, the recipients must acquire integrity in relation to the child, and if they are already spiritually united, then the rite will not be recognized as valid.
Some priests are loyal to this issue and argue as follows: if the marriage was not concluded in the church, this gives the husband and wife the right to baptize one child, since their relationship was not sealed in heaven. To make sure whether a husband and wife can be godparents, enlist the weighty opinion of the highest religious officials and listen to what the Moscow Patriarchate thinks about this. Watch the video below for an in-depth discussion of the topic.
What the Catholic Church Says
A newborn baby must appear before God immediately after birth, be cleansed of original sin, unite with the church. This is how any religion argues and calls for christening at an early age. The process of the ceremony is almost the same everywhere: the baby is washed with water from the font in the temple, the liturgy is read, and at the end they put on a cross. Only the requirements that allow or forbid believers to take certain steps differ. The Catholic Church disagrees with the Orthodox on many issues, and the rite of the sacrament of baptism was no exception.
It all starts with the fact that parents come to the church a couple of weeks in advance to discuss with the priest (priest of the Catholic Church) all the preparations for the ceremony, set a date, and agree with the one who will baptize the child. Godparents in the Catholic faith are endowed with important powers in the life of a child, which include the obligation to take him to Sunday school, prepare him for religious rites (communion, confirmation). The approach to choosing godparents here is doubly complex and is an important task for any believer.
In addition to the awareness and high responsibility of godparents, the Catholic faith has its own rules for choosing a spiritual father and mother. According to the requirements of the church, only people who:
- They believe and practice Catholicism.
- They have no family ties with the baby.
- Have reached the age of 16. If the reasons are good, then the rector can make an exception.
- Catholics by religion who have passed the sacrament of the first Communion and confirmation (bezhmovanie). This is a rite of anointing, which is carried out, being in adulthood. So Catholics confirm that they accepted the faith consciously.
- Are not the parents of the child.
- They are husband and wife.
A married couple - godparents of one child: superstitions and traditions
According to the traditions of the Orthodox Church, a man and a woman who baptize a baby enter into a spiritual relationship. It is valued so highly that no other union is more important than this (including marriage). There are several traditions in the Orthodox faith that cast doubt on the possibility of baptizing other people's children for a married couple. Here are the main points when spouses are forbidden to be sponsors:
- It is forbidden for a couple of people to participate in the sacrament of infant baptism if they are spouses. If this happens, then their marriage will not be able to exist on a spiritual level: it will not have sacred bonds.
- Similarly to married spouses, a couple who intends to enter into a marriage union does not have the right to baptize. Since at the time of baptism they will acquire a spiritual unity (kinship) exalted above the physical, they will have to give up their relationship in favor of acquiring the status of godparents.
- A couple who lives in a civil marriage also does not have the right to become godparents to a child, because initially such bonds are condemned by the church and are considered fornication.
Despite these prohibitions, there are options when a husband and wife have the right to baptize children of the same family if they meet other requirements of the Orthodox Church. They must do this separately: the man baptizes one child, and the woman the other. That is, spouses can christen their siblings (or blood brothers, sisters). If they do this individually, they will not lose the sacredness of their marital union.
If baptism with spouses still occurs due to ignorance, then only the highest authority of the church (the ruling bishop) can resolve such a situation. The couple is petitioning the ruling bishop for a way out of this situation. The outcome can be in the following ways: the recognition of the marriage as invalid or the spouses will be called to repentance for a sin committed out of ignorance.
Who else cannot be made godparents
If you decide to baptize your child, then you must definitely know all the requirements and customs of the church, which forbid taking as godparents (except for husband and wife):
- blood parents of the baby;
- someone who has not been baptized or does not believe in any of the religions (atheist);
- a person who denies any truth of the Orthodox religion;
- if the one who baptizes refers to the sacrament of baptism as a magical rite, and pursues his goals (in the pagan sense);
- people who do not want to become godparents for this child;
- foster father or foster mother;
- people who are members of other faiths;
- children under the age of 14;
- monks and representatives of church rank;
- people whose views are not subject to morality;
- persons with mental disabilities;
- women who experience the days of cleansing by menstruation.
Who can be taken as a successor
When parents think about choosing a godparent for their own child, they should be guided not only by their own considerations. It is necessary to comply with all religious rules, according to which, the godfather or mother can become:
- His relatives are grandparents, aunt or uncle. Perhaps it will be an older sister or brother who has reached the age of fourteen.
- Kumovya (those whose child you yourself are the godfather).
- Godmother of the first child. It happens that a person has already baptized a baby in one family, but a second one was born to them, and the same godparents who baptized the firstborn were taken as godparents.
- If there are no godparents, then the priest who performs the ceremony can become one.
- Pregnant woman.
- An unmarried girl with no children.
Dear parents, you need to understand that you need to choose a godfather who will not only take part in a church ceremony, but will truly love the baby, who will be able to become a spiritual mentor for him for life. Answering the question of who is allowed to be taken as a godfather, the church means a person who is a believer, responsible, conscious and loving, so that the rite acquires the correct meaning and final destination.
When a long-awaited baby is born, the task of parents is to carefully introduce him into the world, protect him from misfortunes, put him on the righteous path. Orthodox parents share this enormous responsibility with their heavenly patron and godparents. After the rite of baptism, the life and fate of the child are entrusted to the aspirations of the Lord and the instructions of the godparents.
How to choose godparents
Baptism is a church sacrament, at the moment of which the further fate of the human soul is determined. At baptism, the child's godparents are determined. How to choose godparents for your beloved child, to whom to entrust such responsibility, can a husband and wife be godparents?
In fairness, it should be noted that there are some disagreements within the church on this issue. There is an opinion that in our time a married couple can become godparents, and this is being discussed. But these doubts are theoretical, and practically do not affect the daily life of the church. In the interests of the further well-being of godparents and godchildren, it is better to follow the approved order of things when choosing.
The role of godparents in the life of a godson
According to church rules, adult Orthodox parishioners can be christening recipients. After all, the godfather and mother should become spiritual mentors to the child for life. Can, for example, your friends husband and wife be worthy godparents for your child? After all, their role only begins after baptism: they must introduce the godson to the church, introduce him to Christian virtue, and teach the basics of religion. These should be responsible, sincerely believing people, because it is their prayers for the godson throughout his life that are paramount to the Lord. The choice of godparents for a child is a responsible step. The main thing is the ability of these people to answer for the godson before God, take care of his spiritual development and guide him on the righteous path. The Church believes that the godfather should take all the sins of the godchild, who has not reached the age of 16, onto himself.
Who should not be chosen as godparents
When choosing godparents, the child's family is puzzled by the problem, can a husband and wife be godparents? For example, a familiar married couple, close to the godson's family in spirit and in the church, is the best suited for the role of mentors. Their family is a model of harmony, their relationship is permeated with love and mutual understanding. But can this husband and wife be godparents?
Can a husband and wife have the same child as godparents? No, according to church laws, this is unacceptable. For the spiritual connection that arises between the recipients at baptism gives rise to a close spiritual union, which is higher than any other, including love and marriage. It is unacceptable that spouses could become godparents, this will jeopardize the further existence of their marriage.
If the husband and wife are in a civil marriage
The doubt whether a husband and wife in a civil marriage can be godparents, the church unequivocally decides in the negative. According to church rules, neither a husband and wife, nor a couple who are on the eve of marriage can become godparents. While preaching to Orthodox people the need for a church marriage, the church at the same time considers civil marriage, that is, registered in the registry office, legal. Therefore, the doubt whether a husband and wife who have approved their union by registering in the registry office can be godparents is resolved by a negative answer.
Engaged couples cannot become godparents, as they are on the eve of marriage, as well as couples living together outside of marriage, since these unions are considered sinful.
Who can become a godfather
Can a husband and wife be godparents to different children? Yes, this is a completely acceptable option. The husband, for example, will become the godfather of the son of close people, and the wife - the goddaughter. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, older sisters and brothers can also become godparents. The main thing is that it should be a worthy Orthodox Christian, ready to help the child grow up in the Orthodox faith. Choosing a godfather is a really responsible decision, because it is done for life. The godfather cannot be changed later. If the godfather stumbles on the path of life, deviates from the righteous direction, it is fitting for the godson to take care of him with prayers.
Rules for the rite of baptism
Before the ceremony, future godparents are trained in the church, get acquainted with the basic rules:
Before the sacrament of baptism, they observe a three-day fast, confess and take communion;
Be sure to put on a pectoral Orthodox cross;
Dress appropriately for the ceremony; women wear a skirt below the knees, be sure to cover their heads; do not use lipstick;
Godparents must know and understand the meaning of "Our Father" and "Symbol of Faith", as these prayers are pronounced during the ceremony.
Controversial cases
In exceptional cases, situations arise when parents have no other choice for godparents, except for a single married couple. Doubts whether a husband and wife can be godparents for a child are more than relevant in this case. It must be remembered that, according to church rules, it is quite enough to determine for a child only one godfather, but of the same sex, that is, we choose a godfather for a boy, and a godmother for a girl.
In each case, when parents have individual questions or doubts about whether it is possible for a husband and wife to be godparents, they should be discussed with the priest during preparation for baptism. Rarely, but still, there are cases when the question of whether a husband and wife can be godparents, with special permission and in view of exceptional circumstances, is resolved positively by the church.
Hello. Tell me, please, why is it impossible for people who baptized the same baby to then marry? How serious is this sin? Before the wedding, no one asked me and my husband about this, but we could also be the godparents of one baby? Thank you.
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